Lively plays for live people

by Thomas S. Denison

Gin. De postman says dese letters belong here; dey wouldn’t take ’em at Number 5.

Mrs. D. I yoost get even on Number 5; I’ll send Number five de togs.

Gin. What dogs?

Mrs. D. Dere’s been seven, nine men here mit togs dis mornin’.

Gin. De dickens! ole massa’ll take a fit.

Mrs. D. All sorts o’ togs at dot side door. Big Newfounlant togs, rat togs, sky pups, oont all dot. Dey make me real mat sayin’ so often dot we want no togs. (Bell rings.)

Gin. Blame dat bell.

Mrs. D. Ginger, why aint you more gwick answerin’ dot bell?

Gin. (Imitating her accent.) Nefer mint, I’m gwick enough already, aint it? Say, I wonder—(bell violently)—if somebody isn’t playing a trick on ole massa? (Voice inside from door in flat.) “Potts, the bell.” Geeminy; ole massa done heerd. Say, anybody fotch any kids yet?

Mrs. D. Dere was no shildrens yet.