When you allow your mind to entertain impure thoughts and words, the blood rushes to the genital organs and they become inflamed, resulting in passion. Now your victory over this habit will come just as fast as you can learn to get control of your mind in these matters. This is not done in a day. For five or six years you have allowed your mind to entertain wrong thoughts. In this way you have brought about a condition in which the slightest suggestions relating to sex, any pressure or friction of clothing or irritation of parts causes the blood to rush to these organs apparently without your willing it. This will gradually cease as you begin to get control of your mind.
There are several things that will help you. When you are tempted to entertain impure thoughts or to practice the sin, immediately engage your mind in something else. Pray, read the Bible or some good book, write a letter to mamma or some friend, perform some duty or take a walk, anything that will take your mind from the temptation. Refuse to handle these organs except to keep them clean. Bathing the parts in cold water tends to allay passion. If you have in your possession any suggestive pictures or questionable literature, destroy them. Cultivate the habit of looking upon every young man as you would upon your brother or father.
One of the most common effects of this habit is discouragement, gloominess, despondency. These mental states must be overcome. Constantly a firm “I will break from this habit,” “I will have only pure thoughts.” Don’t chide and condemn yourself any more because of the errors of the past. God has mercifully and lovingly forgiven them and graciously offers to give you strength and grace with which to win the battles of the future. Hopefully, cheerfully and bravely face the future. You may occasionally meet with defeat. If so, try again. No lasting defeat can come to one who keeps on trying. Victory will crown the persistent effort.
We often help ourselves by helping others. You are only one of the many girls who have had a similar experience. The battles you are fighting in your life will enable you to be a blessing to other weak ones.
If I can be of any help to you in the future, write me. If this letter helps you in any small degree to win a victory, pass the blessing on to another.
“Very sincerely,
“T. W. S.”
CHAPTER XVIII
MOTHER’S FIFTH TALK—A SMALL GIRL’S ETHICS
The social nature.—You are now of an age when you will appreciate a heart to heart talk on the social relations of small girls and boys. God gave to us our social natures. It is our social nature that leads us to desire new acquaintances, to be with old friends, to be in large gatherings of people, and to have special friends. A reasonable amount of social activity is essential to our well-being. Most of our real pleasure in life grows out of our relation to society. Genuine innocent pleasure is nature’s greatest tonic. Innocent games, a big romp, a good laugh, all help to develop the body, prolong life and increase one’s usefulness. Plays, games, a good time, should form a large part of childhood. The boy’s masculine nature leads him often to prefer games that require strength, endurance and daring. The girl’s feminine nature leads her often to prefer games that require less of strength, endurance and danger. It is for this reason that boys enjoy games of football and baseball and girls enjoy their dolls, tennis and croquet.
Boys and girls should play together.—While boys prefer to play with boys much of the time and girls prefer to play with girls much of the time, yet their opposite natures lead them to enjoy being with each other in conversation and games. In most homes and communities, boys and girls are nearly equally divided as to number. This would indicate that God planned for boys and girls to be much with each other.