and morally, your equal is natural, enjoyable and in many ways very helpful.
Girls should demand a single standard of morals.—You should treat young men as you would wish young women to treat your brother. Many young men will want to call, whose habits and character are such that you cannot associate with them, without injury to your social and moral standing. If you do not know a young man’s record, who seeks your company, have your papa or brother look it up. Be frank, kind and positive in your explanation that you cannot encourage his attentions because of his evil habits and his bad record. Assure him that you will gladly assist him to reform and to step up to the standard you hold for a young man, but that you cannot and will not approve of his life by stepping down to his plane. If all girls would demand a “white life” of young men, fewer would sow their “wild oats.” If all sensible and moral girls would frankly and kindly express their disapproval of the filthy, expensive and injurious habits of using tobacco and drink, there would be fewer “boozers” and unfortunate appendixes to the wet end of cigarettes.
Many young men are indiscreet or immoral.—In your association with young men be natural, be yourself, be frank, use good sense, guard against any indiscretion in yourself or in young men. It is a custom with many young men to try to hold the girl’s hand, to play with her hair, to pinch her arms, to pat her cheeks, to drop carelessly their hands in her lap, or to place their arms about her neck or waist. Unless densely ignorant, such young men are vicious. All the males among the lower animals, at certain seasons, make a peculiar noise recognized by the females as a “sex call,” and the males have their peculiar methods of teasing the females inviting their consent to the sexual act. Whether young people put this sex interpretation on pinching, caressing, hugging and kissing or not, it is, in its final analysis, a sex call. These are the methods used by the seducer. These are the indiscretions into which uninformed youths easily drift to their ruin.
If a young man appears to be ignorant of the real nature of these indiscretions, he is to be pitied and helped. If he persists in these indiscretions, he should not be extended the courtesy of an invitation to make another call. If you allow one young man to kiss you, he believes that you allow others the same privilege, whether you do or not. Young men who possess one spark of manhood will admire and respect you more than the girls they may kiss.
Be sensible.—In your conversation with young men, have something sensible and interesting to say. Have some charming story to read or tell them. Have them read or tell you a story. This will enable you to help them cultivate an interest in intellectual matters. Many young people get into the habit of indulging in the most insane and ridiculous conversation.
“Hands off.”—Moonlight walks along unfrequented streets or roads, night buggy rides, late hours in the parlor, low-necked dresses and suggestive post cards, photos and pictures are unnecessary sources of temptation. When young women permit these social privileges and conditions, young men naturally conclude that they are easy victims. The clear-eyed, frank, pure, common-sense girl will have but little trouble in letting young men know her disapproval of that which is questionable, indiscreet or undignified. They will soon learn to respect her convictions. She will seldom find it necessary to enforce her ideals in an aggressive way. She will kindly, tactfully and positively enforce the rule, “hands off”; she will keep ever in her mind the ideal of manhood she hopes one day to realize in her king. She will never do or say anything while entertaining young men that would displease the mental image of her future prince.