Tho' I would not for the World be so impious and profane as to believe, what is contain'd and imply'd in the Letter of this Story; yet I am still too grave to handle it as ludicrously as I ought; and it is now against the grain, that I write so freely, as I shall against it, being unwilling, not only to put the Clergy out of all Temper, but, to give Scoffers and Infidels so great an Advantage against their Ministry of the Letter. Some may wonder that I, who have gone so far in the ludicrous display of the gross Absurdities of some other Miracles, should boggle at this. But to be ingenuous, and speak the Truth sincerely, I am still a Christian (for all what the Bishop of St. David's,[232] Archdeacon Stubbs, and others would make of me) upon the Principles of the Fathers, and have a greater Veneration for the Person of the Holy Jesus, than to be forward to make such sport with him, his Mother, and his Disciples, as this Story affords Scope for. And if it was not for the necessity of turning the Clergy's Heads to the Consideration of Mysteries; this Miracle should have been pass'd by in silence.
There were some antiently, whom St. Chrysostom[233] writes of, whether Jews, Gentiles, or Hereticks, I know not, who took great offence at the Story of this Wedding, accounting it, from what is related in St. John, as a riotous Feast, and that Jesus and his Mother, and his Disciples, not only bore a part in the Revellings, but were most to blame for them, or he should not have countenanced them with his Presence, much less promoted them, by the Change of a large quantity of Water into Wine for the use of a Company, who were already drunk with it. But I, with St. Chrysostom, am inclined to believe, that, if Jesus did grace this Wedding with his Presence, there was no Excess encouraged, or so much as suffer'd at it. If he did accept of the Invitation of the Bridegroom, it was for an Opportunity, not so much to turn Water into Wine, as to make a proper Discourse to the People of conjugal Duties; and, as he was a Searcher of the Hearts, secretly to admonish the Married of the Sin and Mischief of Adultery; tho' we read not of a seasonable and good Word spoken at it.
And the Empress Eudocia, a nursing Mother of the Church, has given us a Poetical, and I hope a fictitious Description of this Wedding. She makes a sumptuous and voluptuous Feast of it; and writes[234] of Musick and Dancing in abundance, enough to make us think of such Mirth and Pastime here, as was unbecoming of a Company of Saints to be present at. Whether it was, that this Empress, being only accustom'd to the Excesses of a Court, could form no meaner Conceptions of a Country Wedding; or whether she had any extra-scriptural Authority for what she writ, I know not: But I believe, that, if Jesus was at all at a Marriage-Feast, the whole was conducted with Decency, Order, and Sobriety; and if he there wrought any Miracle, it was to manifest his Glory, to the Conversion of some, and Confirmation of the Faith of others.
And our Translators of the Bible too have given occasion to suspect somewhat of Excess at this Wedding; or they need not have made the Waterpots to hold two or three Firkins apiece. If I had been the Translator, they should not have held above two or three Pints apiece, which Measure is as agreeable to the Original as Firkin; neither can I imagine, that Jesus, if he did convert Water into Wine, would do it in so large a Measure, for fear of an intemperate abuse of it, but only gave the Company a cast of his miraculous Power, and a little Taste of his Love and Good-will to them.
Such are the Conceptions, that, to the Honour of Jesus, I am willing to form of this Wedding; and wish that the Letter of the Story did suggest no worse Thoughts of it to us. I should be pleas'd, if no Infidel really could, what I, but for the sake of the Mystery most unwillingly should, write any ludicrous Descants on it. But if this Story had been related of Apollonius Tyranæus, as it is of our Jesus, I would have ridicul'd and satiriz'd it to the utmost of my Power, and have render'd him and his Disciples of all Nations, as contemptible as I could, for the Belief of it; and I don't doubt, but our Christian Priests would have given me ample Praises and Commendations for so doing. It is said of Apollonius, that for the Entertainment of his Friends, he commanded variety of nice Dishes of Meat, together with Bowls of choicest Wines, all on a sudden to descend upon his Table and range themselves in good Order. Whether there was any Truth in this Miracle of Apollonius, is not the Question; but Mr. Chandler[235] could see a Fault in it, (tho' none in Jesus's Wine at this Wedding) as if it was done for the Pleasure of luxurious Appetites, tho' we read of no Intemperance at it, which can't be said of the Wedding-Feast before us. Our Divines I suppose, no more than myself, believe any thing of the said Miracle in Apollonius; but, if it was really wrought, I fancy, I could have lampoon'd him for it, and would have made it a diabolical Work, like that, as Fables go, of the Feastings of Wizards and Witches; and our Divines (passing by Jesus's Wine here) would readily, as they are Believers of the Storys of Witchcraft, have struck in with me.
But setting aside that miraculous Story of Apollonius, which has but one Voucher; the Case before us is Jesus's turning Water into Wine for the use of Men, who had before well drank. How shall I force Nature and Faith to ridicule this Story? How shall I lay aside that profound Veneration for the Holy Jesus, which Conversation with the Fathers, more than the Prejudice of Education has begotten in me, and ludicrously here treat him and his Miracle too, as is incumbent upon me, to make way for the Mystery? In short, I can't do it, in my own Name; but having met with a satirical Invective of a supposed Jewish Rabbi to this purpose, I here publish it, that our Clergy, as well as myself, may think of an Answer to it, and so prevent that Mischief it may do by being handed about among Jews and Infidels, in Manuscript. It is as follows;
"You Christians pay Adoration to Jesus, whom you believe to be a divine Author of Religion, sent of God for the Instruction, Reformation and Salvation of Mankind, and what induces you to this Belief of him, is, (besides some obscure Prophecies, which you can't agree upon, and which neither your selves, nor any body else understands the Application of) the History of his Miracles: But I wonder, you should have a good opinion of him for his Miracles, which, if he wrought no better than what are recorded of him, by your Evangelists, are, if duly consider'd, enough to alienate your Hearts from him. I can't spare time now to examine into all of them, but according to the cursory Observation I have made on them, there is not one so well circumstanced, as to merit a considerate Man's belief, that it was the Work of an omnipotent, all-wise, just and good Agent. Some of them are absurd Tales, others foolish Facts, others unjust Actions, others ludicrous Pranks, others jugling Tricks, others magical Enchantments; and if many of them had been better and greater Operations than they are, and of a more useful and stupendous Nature than they seem to be; yet the first Miracle that he wrought, viz. that of his turning Water into Wine at an extravagant and voluptuous Wedding at Cana of Galilee, is enough to turn our Stomachs against all the rest. It is in itself enough to beget in us an ill opinion of Jesus, and to prepossess us with an aversion to his Religion, without farther Examination into it. It is enough to make us suspect his other Miracles, of what Name soever, to be of a base, magical, and diabolical Extraction; or he had never set up for a divine worker of Miracles with so ill a grace. Would any sober, grave, serious and divine Person, as you Christians suppose Jesus to have been, have vouchsafed his Presence at a Wedding; where such Levities, Diversions and Excesses (in our Nation of the Jews, as well as in all others) were indulg'd on such Occasions, as were not fit to be seen, much less countenanc'd by the Saint, you would make of him. If your Jesus, his Mother, and his Disciples had not been merry Folks in themselves, they would have declined the Invitation of the Bridegroom; nay, it they had been at all graver and more serious People than ordinary, no Invitation had been given to such Spoil-Sports: But boon Companions they were, and of comical Conversation, or there had been at a Wedding no Room for them. You Christians may fancy, what you please, of Jesus and his Mother's Saintship; but the very Text of the Story implies, they were Lovers of good Fellowship and Excess too, upon occasion; or he had never, upon her Intimation, turn'd so large a quantity of Water into Wine, after all or most of the Company were far gone with it. You may suppose, if you please, that all were sober, and none intoxicated, and that the Want of Wine proceeded from the abundance of Company, rather than excess in drinking; but why then did John the Evangelist use the word μεθυσθασι, which implies, they were more than half Seas over? And if Jesus and his Mother had not both a mind to top them up; the one would not have requested, nor the other have granted a Miracle to that purpose. Whether Jesus and his Mother themselves were at all cut, as were others of the Company, is not so certain. She might be an abstemious Dame for ought we know; tho' if old Stories are true of her familiarity with a Soldier, of whom came her chara Deûm Soboles, in all probability she would take a Dram and a Bottle too. But it looks as if Jesus himself was a little in for't, or he had never spoke so waspishly and snappishly to his Mother, saying, Woman, what have I to do with thee? mine Hour is not yet come: which was very unbecoming of a dutiful Son, who, excepting when he ran away from his Parents, and put them to[236] Sorrow and Trouble to look him up, was, and is still in Heaven, say the Roman Catholicks a most obedient Child. You modern Christians may put what Construction you can upon the words above of Jesus to his Mother, to salve his Credit; but the Fathers of your Church[237] confess them to be a sharp and surly Reply to her, which, if it did not proceed from the natural badness of his Temper, derived, ex traduce, from his supposed Father yet, was certainly the effect of Drinking, and that's the more likely, because it is a broken and witless Sentence, such as Fuddlecaps utter by halves, when the Wine's in, and the Wit's out. Your modern Commentators are sadly puzzled to make good Sense of this broken and abrupt Sentence of Jesus, and a pertinent Reply of it, to what his Mother said to him, they have no Wine: If you will bear with me, I'll help you out at this dead lift, and give you the true meaning of it thus. Jesus's Mother being apprised of a deficiency of Wine, and willing, as well as the Bridegroom, that the Company should be thorowly merry before they parted, intimates to her Son, (whom she knew to be initiated in the Mysterys of Bacchus) that they had no Wine: But before she could finish her Request to him, He, mistaking her meaning, imagines, she was cautioning against drinking more Wine, and exhorting him to go home; whereupon he takes her up short and quick, saying, Woman, what have you to do with me? (for that too is the English of the Greek) I'll not be interrupted in my Cups, nor break Company; for mine Hour is not yet come to depart: But after he rightly apprehended her, he goes to work, and rather than the Company should want their fill, by trick of Art, like a Punch-maker, meliorates Water into what they call'd Wine. That this is the obvious Interpretation, and natural Paraphrase of the Words before us, shall be try'd by the Absurd Comments now-a-days put upon them, that are enough to make a considerate Man laugh, if not hiss at them.
"Some antient Hereticks[238], very gravely inferr'd from this Expression, Woman, what have I to do with thee, that Mary was neither a Virgin, nor Jesus her Son; or he had never accosted her with such blunt Language, that implys, they could not be so akin to each other. This was a perplexity to St. Augustin, and gave him some trouble to explain the Expression, consistently with her Virginity (for all she cohabited with the old Carpenter) and his Filiation. But this being a quibble, that has been long since dropt, I shall not revive, nor insist on it. But that the Expression above do's suppose a little Inebriation, in Jesus, I may avert, neither is there a better Solution to be made of it.
"The Fathers of your Church, being sensible of the absurdity, abruptness, impertinence, pertness, and senslesness of the Passage before us according to the Letter, had recourse to a mystical and allegorical Interpretation, as the only way to make it consistent with the Wisdom, Sobriety and Duty of the Holy Jesus. But you Moderns, abandoning Allegories and Mysteries on Miracles, have endeavour'd, I say, to put other Constructions upon it, as may comport with the Letter and Credit of Jesus: But how insipid and sensless they are, I appeal to a reasonable Man, who will give himself the trouble to consult them, upon the Place, and save me the Pains of a tedious and nauseous Work to recount them for him.
"But to Humour the Christian Priesthood at this Day, I will suppose that Jesus, and his Mother, and Disciples, tho' Fishermen, to have been all sober, grave and serious at this Wedding, suitably to the Opinion that their Followers now would have us to entertain of them. But then it is hard to conceive them, less than Spectators and even Encouragers of Excess and Intemperance in others; or Jesus, after their more than sufficient drinking for the satisfaction of Nature, had never turn'd Water into Wine, nor would his Mother have requested him to do it, if, I say, they had not a mind, and took Pleasure in it too, to see the Company quite stitch'd up.
"A sober, prudent and wise Philosopher or Magician, in the place of Jesus, if he had an Art or Power to turn Water into Wine, would never have exercised it upon such an occasion; no, not to please his best Friends, nor in obedience to the most indulgent Parent. What would he have said in such a Case? That the Company had drank sufficiently already, and there was no need of more Wine: The Bridegroom had kindly and plentifully entertain'd his Guests, and he would not for the Honour of God, who had endow'd him with a divine Power, be at the Expence of a Miracle to promote the least Intemperance. Whether such a Speech and Resolution in Jesus, upon this occasion, would not have been more commendable, than what he did, let any one judge.
"If I was a Christian, I would, for the Honour of Jesus, renounce this Miracle, and not magnify and extol it as a divine and good Act, as many now-a-days do. I would give into, and contend for the Truth of that Gloss, which the Gentiles of old[239] by way of Objection put upon it, viz. That the Company having exhausted the Bridegroom's Stock of Wine, and being in Expectation of more; Jesus, rather than the Bridegroom should be put to the Blush for deficiency, palm'd a false Miracle, by the help of the Governour of the Feast, upon a drunken Crew; that is, having some spirituous Liquors at hand, mingled them with a quantity of Water, which the Governour of the Feast vouch'd to be incomparable good Wine, miraculously made by Jesus: and the Company being, thro' a vitiated Palate, uncapable of distinguishing better from worse, and of discovering the Fraud, admired the Wine and the Miracle; and applauded Jesus for it, and perhaps became his Disciples upon it. If I, I say, was a Disciple of Jesus, I would give this Story such an old turn for his Credit. And I appeal to indifferent Judges, whether such a daubing of the Miracle, to remove the Offence of Infidels at this Day, would not be politically and wisely done of me. Whether modern Christians may be brought into such a Notion of this supposed Miracle, I know not; but really there is room enough to suspect such a Fraud in it.
"But supposing Jesus's Change of Water into Wine to have been a real Miracle; none commission'd of God for the Reformation and Instruction of Mankind would ever have done it here. Miracles (as Mr. Chandler[240] says excellently well) must be such things, as that it is consistent with the Perfections of God, to interest himself in; and again, they must argue not only the Power of God, but his Love to Mankind, and his Inclination to do them good; which this of Jesus is so far from, that it has an evil Aspect and Tendency, as is above represented; consequently it is to be rejected, and no longer esteem'd a divine Miracle; neither is Jesus to be received as a Revealer of God's Will for it, as Mr. Chandler will bear me witness.
"No doubt on't, but you Christian Priests would have us Jews and Infidels, to believe the whole Company at this Wedding, for all what is intimated by St. John to the contrary, to consist of sober and demure Saints. I will suppose so; but then, what occasion had they at all for Wine? What reason could there be for God's Power to interpose and make it, especially in so large a quantity, for them? I can conceive none. If any of the Company had been taken with fainting Fits; and Jesus for want of a Cordial Bottle, had created a chearing Drain or two, I could not have found fault with it; tho' even here, if he had restored the Patient with a word of his Mouth, it had been a better Miracle, than making of Wine for him: But that he should make for a Company of Sots, a large quantity of Wine, of no less than twelve or eighteen Firkins of English Measure, enough to intoxicate the whole Town of Cana of Galilee, is what can never be accounted for by a Christian, who should, one would think, wish this Story, for the Reputation of Jesus expunged out of the New Testament.
"Besides, if Jesus had really and miraculously made Wine, which no Power or Art of Man could do, he should, to prevent all suspicion of deceit in the Miracle, have done it without the use of Water. You Christians say, he is the original Cause of all Things out of nothing; why then did he not[241] create this Wine out of nothing? why did he not order the Pots to be emptied of their Water, if there was any in them, and then with a word of his Mouth command the filling them with Wine instead of it? Here had been an unexceptionable Miracle, which no Infidels could have cavil'd at, for any thing, but the needlessness of it. But this subject Matter of Water spoils the Credit of the Miracle. The Water-Pots, it seems, are to be fill'd, before Jesus could do the notable Feat; is not this enough to make us think, that Jesus was but an artificial Punch-maker? Could not he create Wine without Water for a Transmutation? Yes, you'll say he could: what was the Reason then, that he did not? This is a reasonable Question to a learned Priesthood: and a rational Answer should be given to it. And a Question too it is that heretofore has been under debate. Some said that the Water might be used to abate of the[242] immensity of the Miracle, which otherwise for its greatness might have surpass'd all Belief. But this Reason will not do. A Miracle can't be too great in itself, if well attested, to transcend Credit: but it may easily be too little to conciliate the Faith of a Free-Thinker. The Fathers of your Church fetch'd a Reason, for the use of Water here, from the Mystery; but since Mysterys on Miracles are set aside by the Priesthood of this Age, they are to assign another and good Reason of their own; or this Miracle is to be rejected, as a Piece of Art and Craft in the Operator, if for no other Reason than this, that Jesus used Water to make Wine.
"All that I have to say more to this Miracle, is, that it is to be wish'd, if Jesus could turn Water into Wine, that he had imparted the Secret and Power to his Disciples of the Priesthood of all Ages since, which would have been of greatest Advantage to them in this World. He has empower'd them, they say, to remit Sins, which few old Sinners think themselves the less in danger for: And he has enabled them, some say, to transubstantiate Bread into Flesh, and Wine into Blood, which none but foolish and superstitious Folks believe they ever did: And he promised to invest them with a Power to do greater Miracles than himself, even to remove Mountains, and to curse Trees; but I thank God, they never were of so strong a Faith, as to put it in Practice, or we might have heard of the natural state, as well as we do now of the civil state of some Countrys, ruin'd and overturn'd by them. But this Power to transmute Water into Wine, without Labour and Expence, would have been of better worth to them, than all their other Priestly Offices. Not, that our Conduits would thereupon run with Wine, instead of Water; or that Wine would be cheaper and more plentiful than it is now, excepting among themselves, if they could withal curse Vineyards. They would make the best Penny they a could of their divine Power. And as surely as they can now fell the Waterdrops of their Fingers at a Christening, at a good Rate, they would set a better Price on their miraculously made Wine, and give a notable Reason for its dearness, viz. that Miracles should not be cheap, which would bring them into Contempt, and lessen the Wonder and Admiration of them."
So ends the Invective of a suppos'd Jewish Rabbi against this Miracle; which our Divines, as well as myself, are to consider of an Answer to. Whether they shall think themselves able to answer the rational Parts of it, consistently with the Letter, I know not; but I own myself unable, and believe it impossible for them, to do it: And therefore they must of necessity go along with me to the mystical Interpretation of the Fathers; or this Miracle will turn to the dishonour of Jesus, and disadvantage of his Religion.
Justin Martyr[243] says, it is absurd to take the Stories of the Marriages and Concubinages of the Patriarchs of the Old Testament in a literal Sense. And indeed, literally consider'd, they are some of them too luscious Tales to be related by divine and inspired Penmen: whereupon he, as well as St. Paul and Philo-Judæus[244], turn these Stories for the Honour of God and Edification of his Church, into an Allegory. Consequently, if Justin had had an occasion to speak of this Marriage before us, there's no doubt on't, but he would have made Mystery of all and every Part of it.