We'll give you your certificate, and if you want it signed,

Come back and have a fling at us whenever you're inclined!

You harrowed us with murder and with blood;

You dipped us deep in Simla's petty guile;

Yet we have found ourselves misunderstood

When we served you a sensation in our style;

And though you saw some grewsome pictures through

The Windy City's magnifying lens,

Yet we took it just a little hard of you,

A-objecting to the slaughter of our pens!