BONGRACE.
Why, then, darest thou to presume to tell me,
That I know is no wise possible for to be?
CAREAWAY.
Now, by my truth, master, I have told you no lie;
And all these folks knoweth as well as I,
I had no sooner knocked at the gate,
But straightway he had me by the pate;
Therefore, if you beat me, till I fart and shit again,
You shall not cause me for any pain;
But I woll affirm, as I said before,
That when I came near, another stood at the door.
BONGRACE.
Why, thou naughty villain, darest thou affirm to me
That which was never seen nor hereafter shall be?
That one man may have two bodies and two faces,
And that one man at one time may be in two places?
Tell me, drankest thou anywhere by the way?
CAREAWAY.
I shrew me, if I drank any more than twice to-day,
Till I met even now with that other I,
And with him I supped and drank truly;
But as for you, if you gave me drink and meat,
As oftentimes as you do me beat,
I were the best-fed page in all this city.
But, as touching that, you have on me no pity,
And not only I, but all that do you serve,
For meat and drink may rather starve.
BONGRACE.
What, you saucy malapert knave,
Begin you with your master to prate and rave?
Your tongue is liberal and all out of frame:
I must needs conjure it, and make it tame.
Where is that other Careaway that thou said was here?
CAREAWAY.
Now, by my Christendom, sir, I wot ne'er?
BONGRACE.
Why, canst thou find no man to mock but me?
CAREAWAY.
I mock you not, master, so mot I the,
Every word was true that I you told.
BONGRACE.
Nay I know toys and pranks of old,
And now thou art not satisfied nor content,
Without regard of my biddings and commandment,
To have played by the way as a lewd knave and negligent,
When I thee on my message home sent,
But also wouldest willingly me delude and mock,
And make me to all wise men a laughing-stock:
Showing me such things as in no wise be may,
To the intent thy lewdness may turn to jest and play;
Therefore if thou speak any such thing to me again,
I promise it shall be unto thy pain.
CAREAWAY.
Lo, is not he in miserable case,
That serveth such a master in any place?
That with force woll compel him that thing to deny,
That he knoweth true, and hath seen with his eye?