WILL SUM. What an ass is this! I cannot drink so much, though I should burst.
BAC. Fool, do not refuse your moist sustenance: come, come, dog's head in the pot; do what you are born to.
WILL SUM. If you will needs make me a drunkard against my will, so it is; I'll try what burden my belly is of.
BAC. Crouch, crouch on your knees, fool, when you pledge God Bacchus.
[Here WILL SUMMER drinks, and they sing
about him, BACCHUS begins.
All. Monsieur Mingo for quaffing did surpass
In cup, in can, or glass.
BAC. Ho, well shot, a toucher, a toucher! For quaffing Toy doth pass, In cup, in can, or glass.[93]
All. God Bacchus, do him right,
And dub him knight.
BAC. Rise up, Sir Robert Toss-pot.
[Here he dubs WILL SUMMER with the black jack.
SUM. No more of this, I hate it to the death.
No such deformer of the soul and sense,
As is this swinish damn'd horn drunkenness.
Bacchus, for thou abusest so earth's fruits,
Imprison'd live in cellars and in vaults.
Let none commit their counsels unto thee;
Thy wrath be fatal to thy dearest friends;
Unarmed run upon thy foemen's swords;
Never fear any plague, before it fall:
Dropsies and watery tympanies haunt thee;
Thy lungs with surfeiting be putrified,
To cause thee have an odious stinking breath;
Slaver and drivel like a child at mouth;
Be poor and beggarly in thy old age;
Let thine own kinsmen laugh when thou complain'st,
And many tears gain nothing but blind scoffs.
This is the guerdon due to drunkenness:
Shame, sickness, misery follow excess.