Alph. Upon what accident?
Lol. This: when your negligence had left your clothes upon my bed, he espied them, tasked me for the owner; I, in excuse, told him it was a suit brought by my gossip to be sold; he straight, like a child proud of a new coat, presently puts it on, presently is sent for to the senate, and at this present hath left you, that the world may behold your naked doings.
Alph. I would it were washed in the blood of a centaur,[201] that when he puts it off, his skin might follow it: but how shall I get to my chamber?
Lol. Truly, I know not, except you will wear a smock's upper coat.
Alph. What, a petticoat? you mad me with your mirth.
Lol. Then seriously thus: as he hath ta'en your clothes, you must take his; and let the world know you have had more than fiddler's fare, for you have meat, money, and cloth.
Alph. 'Sfoot, how shall I look in this devil's suit? sure, I shall grow sick to see my shape.
Lol. Well, extremity must then be your physic; but come, you shall attire yourself in my chamber.
[Exeunt Alphonso, Lollia, and Collaquintida.
Mech. Are these the winding turns of female shames,
Loose woman's gambols, and the tricks of sin?
And are we born to bear these suffrages?
O, he that's tied unto a brothel bed
Feels his worst hell on earth, and may presume
There is no sickness like his pestilence.
Well, what the issue of this jest will prove,
My wit but yet conceives, and aftertime
Shall perfect it and give it liberty,
In such sort that, if it true fire strike,
A world of apes shall study for the like. [Exit.