And the cook who trieth your appetite

Will steal no more than she thinks is right;

When the boy you hire will call you “Sir,”

Instead of “Say” and “Guverner”;

When the funny man is humorsome—

How can we stand the millennium?

SOLDIER, REST!

A Russian sailed over the blue Black Sea

Just when the war was growing hot,

And he shouted, “I’m Tjalikavakeree—