Greene. O monstrous lie! 10
Will. Faith, in a manner I have. The bawdy-houses
have paid me tribute; there durst not a whore set
up, unless she have agreed with me first for opening
her shop-windows. For a cross word of a tapster
I have pierced one barrel after another with my
dagger, and held him by the ears till all his beer
hath run out. In Thames Street a brewer’s cart
was like to have run over me: I made no more ado,
but went to the clerk and cut all the notches of his
tallies and beat them about his head. I and my
company have taken the constable from his watch,
and carried him about the fields on a coltstaff. I
have broken a sergeant’s head with his own mace,
and bailed whom I list with my sword and buckler.
All the tenpenny-alehouses-men would stand every
morning with a quart-pot in their hand, saying,
‘Will it please your worship drink?’ He that had
not done so, had been sure to have had his sign
pulled down and his lattice borne away the next
night. To conclude, what have I not done? yet
cannot do this; doubtless, he is preserved by
miracle. 32
Here enters Alice and Michael.
Greene. Hence, Will! here comes Mistress Arden.
Alice. Ah, gentle Michael, art thou sure they’re friends?
Michael. Why, I saw them when they both shook hands.
When Mosbie bled, he even wept for sorrow,
And railed on Franklin that was cause of all.
No sooner came the surgeon in at doors,
But my master took to his purse and gave him money,
And, to conclude, sent me to bring you word 40
That Mosbie, Franklin, Bradshaw, Adam Fowle,
With divers of his neighbours and his friends,
Will come and sup with you at our house this night.
Alice. Ah, gentle Michael, run thou back again,
And, when my husband walks into the fair,
Bid Mosbie steal from him and come to me;
And this night shall thou and Susan be made sure.
Michael. I’ll go tell him.
Alice. And as thou goest, tell John cook of our guests,
And bid him lay it on, spare for no cost. 50
[Exit Michael.