"My uncle's."
"When did your uncle die?"
"Lawd, boss, he ain't daid yit!"
"Then how do you know his funeral is going to take place on Friday?"
"'Case dey's gwine hang him Thursday!"
HIS COMPLAINT
To be truthful and at the same time diplomatic is one of the rarest of combinations, and only a small boy would be equal to it:
Johnny's manners had been improving at home, but at what a cost to his appetite when he had an invitation to dine at a boy friend's house! His hostess said, concernedly, when dessert was reached, "You refuse a second helping of pie? Are you suffering from indigestion, Johnny?" "No, ma'am; politeness."
PUTTING IT UP TO THE HORSE
Pat had just joined a horse regiment, and was undergoing the necessary practice in the riding school. After a particularly desperate attempt to unseat its rider, the horse managed to entangle a hoof in one of the stirrups.