Weel mounted on his gray mare, Meg, (A better never lifted leg,)80 Tam skelpit[41] on through dub[42] and mire, Despising wind, and rain, and fire; Whiles holding fast his guid blue bonnet, Whiles crooning o'er some auld Scots sonnet; Whiles glowering round wi' prudent cares,85 Lest bogles[43] catch him unawares:— Kirk-Alloway was drawing nigh, Where ghaists and houlets[44] nightly cry.
By this time he was cross the ford, Where in the snaw the chapman smoored[45];90 And past the birks[46] and meikle stane,[47] Where drunken Charlie brak's neck-bane; And through the whins,[48] and by the cairn,[49] Where hunters fand the murdered bairn[50]; And near the thorn, aboon the well,95 Where Mungo's mither hanged hersel'. Before him Doon pours all his floods; The doubling storm roars through the woods; The lightnings flash from pole to pole; Near and more near the thunders roll;100 When, glimmering through the groaning trees, Kirk-Alloway seemed in a bleeze[51]; Through ilka bore[52] the beams were glancing, And loud resounded mirth and dancing.
Inspiring bold John Barleycorn,[53]105 What dangers thou canst make us scorn! Wi' tippenny, we fear nae evil; Wi' usquebae,[54] we'll face the devil!— The swats sae reamed in Tammie's noddle, Fair play, he cared na deils a boddle.[55]110 But Maggie stood right sair astonished, Till, by the heel and hand admonished, She ventured forward on the light; And, vow! Tam saw an unco sight! Warlocks and witches in a dance;115 Nae cotillion brent[56] new frae France, But hornpipes, jigs, strathspeys,[57] and reels, Put life and mettle in their heels. A winnock-bunker[58] in the east, There sat auld Nick, in shape o' beast;120 A towzie tyke,[59] black, grim, and large, To gie them music was his charge; He screwed the pipes and gart them skirl,[60] Till roof and rafters a' did dirl.[61] Coffins stood round, like open presses,125 That shawed the dead in their last dresses; And by some devilish cantrip slight[62] Each in its cauld hand held a light: By which heroic Tam was able To note upon the haly table,130 A murderer's banes in gibbet airns; Twa span-lang, wee unchristened bairns; A thief, new-cutted frae the rape, Wi' his last gasp his gab[63] did gape; Five tomahawks, wi' bluid red-rusted;135 Five scimitars, wi' murder crusted; A garter which a babe had strangled; A knife, a father's throat had mangled, Whom his ain son o' life bereft,— The gray hairs yet stack to the heft:140 Wi' mair o' horrible and awfu', Which even to name wad be unlawfu'!
As Tammie glow'red, amazed and curious, The mirth and fun grew fast and furious; The piper loud and louder blew;145 The dancers quick and quicker flew; They reeled, they set, they crossed, they cleekit,[64] Till ilka carlin[65] swat and reekit, And coost her duddies[66] to the wark, And linket[67] at it in her sark[68]!150
Now Tam, O Tam! had thae been queans,[69] A' plump and strappin' in their teens; Their sarks, instead o' creeshie flannen,[70] Been snaw-white seventeen-hunder linen[71]! Thir breeks o' mine, my only pair,155 That ance were plush, o' guid blue hair, I wad hae gi'en them off my hurdies,[72] For ae blink o' the bonny burdies[73]! But withered beldams,[74] auld and droll Rigwooddie[75] hags wad spean[76] a foal,160 Louping and flinging on a cummock,[77] I wonder didna turn thy stomach.
But Tam kenned what was what fu' brawlie[78]; There was ae winsome wench and walie,[79] That night enlisted in the core,[80]165 (Lang after kenned on Carrick shore; For monie a beast to dead she shot, And perished monie a bonny boat, And shook baith meikle corn and bear,[81] And kept the country-side in fear.)170 Her cutty-sark,[82] o' Paisley harn,[83] That while a lassie she had won, In longitude though sorely scanty, It was her best, and she was vauntie.[84] Ah! little kenned thy reverend grannie175 That sark she coft[85] for her wee Nannie, Wi' twa pund Scots ('twas a' her riches), Wad ever graced a dance o' witches!
But here my Muse her wing maun cour; Sic flights are far beyond her power;—180 To sing how Nannie lap and flang[86] (A souple jade she was, and strang), And how Tam stood like ane bewitched, And thought his very e'en[87] enriched: Even Satan glow'red and fidged fu' fain,[88]185 And hotched[89] and blew wi' might and main: Till first ae caper, syne[90] anither, Tam tint[91] his reason a' thegither, And roars out: "Weel done, Cutty-sark!" And in an instant all was dark:190 And scarcely had he Maggie rallied, When out the hellish legion sallied. As bees bizz out wi' angry fyke,[92] When plundering herds assail their byke[93]; As open poussie's mortal foes,195 When, pop! she starts before their nose; As eager runs the market-crowd, When "Catch the thief!" resounds aloud; So Maggie runs, the witches follow, Wi' monie an eldritch[94] screech and hollow.200
Ah, Tam! ah, Tam! thou'll get they fairin'[95]! In hell they'll roast thee like a herrin'! In vain thy Kate awaits thy comin'; Kate soon will be a woefu' woman! Now, do thy speedy utmost, Meg,205 And win the keystane o' the brig; There at them thou thy tail may toss, A running-stream they darena cross[96]! But ere the keystane she could make, The fient a tail she had to shake!210 For Nannie, far before the rest, Hard upon noble Maggie prest, And flew at Tam wi' furious ettle,[97]— But little wist she Maggie's mettle! Ae spring brought off her master hale,215 But left behind her ain gray tail: The carlin claught her by the rump, And left poor Maggie scarce a stump.
Now, wha this tale o' truth shall read, Ilk man and mother's son, take heed!220 Whene'er to drink you are inclined, Or cutty-sarks run in your mind, Think ye may buy the joys o'er dear,— Remember Tam o' Shanter's mare.