A naturalist has just announced that she

Works three hours only out of twenty-four.

The Winning Team

Time was, they say, when merit won the bays,

But in these times no man by merit rises;

Alas! we’ve fallen on degenerate days,

For gas and brass now capture all life’s prizes.

Spirits

David Garrick, while performing in Sheffield, and observing that the cellar of a Quaker meeting-house was leased to a wine merchant, wrote the following:

There’s a spirit above, and a spirit below;