On a carter killed in a runaway:
“The road to eternity is not long. He started at 7 o’clock and arrived at 8.”
On a man of letters:
“Here lies the best man in the world. He deprived himself of sleep to bestow it upon others.”
One tomb bears a bas-relief depicting a peasant impaled on the horns of a bull. Below is the inscription:
“It was a bull’s horn that sent me to Heaven. I died in a moment, leaving wife and child. Oh, bull, bull! To think that I owe to you everlasting repose!
This does not speak well for the married life of F. K.:
“Here rests in God F. K., who lived 26 years as a man and 37 years as a husband.”
THE HONEYED PHRASE OF COMPLIMENT
As the beautiful Duchess of Devonshire was one day stepping out of her carriage, a coal-heaver, who was accidentally standing by, and was about to regale himself with his accustomed whiff of tobacco, caught a glance of her countenance, and instantly exclaimed: “Love and bless you, my lady, let me light my pipe in your eyes.” The duchess was so delighted with this compliment that she frequently afterwards checked the strain of adulation, which was so constantly offered to her charms, by saying, “Oh, after the coal-heaver’s compliment, all others are insipid.”