"You mean, contemptible, old rascal! I could knock your head against my barn and I'll——"
"Twenty-seven, twenty-eight, twenty-nine, thirty, thirty-one, thirty-two, thirty-three——"
Here the neighbor ran for the house, and entering it, violently slammed the door behind him. Reubens did not let up on the enumeration, but stood out there alone in his own yard, and kept on counting, while his burning cheeks and flashing eyes eloquently affirmed his judgment. When he got up into the eighties his wife came out to him in some alarm.
"Why, Reubens, man, what is the matter with you? Do come into the house."
But he didn't stop.
"Eighty-seven, eighty-eight, eighty-nine, ninety, ninety-one, ninety-two——"
Then she came to him, and clung tremblingly to him, but he only turned, looked into her eyes, and said:
"Ninety-three, ninety-four, ninety-five, ninety-six, ninety-seven, ninety-eight, ninety-nine, one hundred! Go into the house, old woman, or I'll bust you!"
THEY NEVER QUARRELED
ANONYMOUS
They had been married about three weeks, and had just gone to housekeeping. He was starting down town one morning, and she followed him to the door. They had their arms wrapt around each other, and she was saying: