When we were first married my husband’s wages was £1 a week. I have had seven children; one died at birth, one at one year old, and five are living. Each was about two years and three months old when the other was born. I had one miscarriage, which left me very ill for a long time. I found that the money was so little to do on that I must work as well to pay my way and clothe my children. My husband neither drank or smoked, but when rent, coals, gas, and food is taken out, what was left for other things? I had boarders, and was standing on my legs so much that after the birth of my last child a marble leg set in. I went under an operation, but my leg is still very bad. A mother wants good food before the birth as well as after, but how can it be done out of so little money? If father takes his food it must be as good as can be got; then the children come next and mother last.
Wages 20s.; seven children.
31. Little To Tell.
Why is it these things have never been thought of before? Is it ignorance, or is it that people are got used to the idea that we have to expect all sorts of illnesses when a woman gets pregnant, and we have just to put up with it and do the best we can? Personally, I have very little to tell of my own experiences, although I have four children—two boys and two girls, the eldest fifteen years and the youngest six years. Compared with some working mothers, I have gone through those trying periods fairly well. Also my confinements have on the whole been good. My husband’s occupation is a carpenter and joiner, and he gets the trade union rate of wages of the district.
Wages, trade union rate; four children.
32. Restriction Advocated.
I feel that I must write and explain why I advocate educating women to the idea that they should not bring children into the world without the means to provide for them. I know it is a most delicate subject, and very great care must be used in introducing it, but still, a word spoken sometimes does good. Someone has said that most of the trouble with delicate children were caused by women trying to destroy life in the early days of pregnancy. I do not, of course, recommend that sort of thing. It is absolutely wrong. But it is terrible to see how women suffer, even those that are in better conditions of life. I will quote one or two personal experiences. My grandmother had over twenty children; only eight lived to about fourteen years, only two to a good old age. A cousin (a beautiful girl) had seven children in about seven years; the first five died in birth, the sixth lived, and the seventh died and the mother also. What a wasted life! Another had seven children; dreadful confinements, two or three miscarriages, an operation for trouble in connection with same. Three children died and the mother also quite young. There are cases all round us much worse. You find in the majority of cases that in large families a certain number die and the others have less strength. Of course, there are exceptions. The trouble is that it takes so very long in England for things to be changed, and you are told to mind your own business and let people do as they like; but I am pleased to see that many men and women are getting wiser, to the benefit of the wives and families for whom the poor husband has to provide.
33. “Almost a Wreck.”
I was married at the age of twenty-two (barely twenty-two years), and by the time I had reached my thirty-second birthday was the mother of seven children, and I am sure you will pardon me if I take the credit for bringing up such a family without the loss of even one, seeing that it entailed such a great amount of suffering to myself on account of having to nurse them through all illness, and in addition (after sitting up many nights in succession) being compelled to do all household duties.
During pregnancy I suffered much. When at the end of ten years I was almost a mental and physical wreck, I determined that this state of things should not go on any longer, and if there was no natural means of prevention, then, of course, artificial means must be employed, which were successful, and am happy to say that from that time I have been able to take pretty good care of myself, but often shudder to think what might have been the result if things had been allowed to go on as they were. Two days after childbirth I invariably sat up in bed knitting stockings and doing general repairs for my family. My husband at that time was earning 30s. per week, and out of that amount claimed 6s. 6d. as pocket-money, and when I tell you that through all my difficulties there were no debts contracted on my part, you will be able to form some idea of what women are, in some cases, called upon to endure.