W. C. Dornin.
A JOLLY FAT FRIAR.
A jolly fat friar loved liquor good store,
And he had drunk stoutly at supper;
He mounted his horse in the night at the door,
And he sat with his face at the crupper.
"Some rogue," quoth the friar, "quite dead to remorse,
Some thief, whom a halter will throttle,
Some scoundrel has cut off the head of my horse
While I was engaged at the bottle,
Which went gluggity, gluggity—glug—glug—glug."
The tail of the steed pointed south on the dale,
'Twas the friar's road home straight and level;
But when spurred a horse follows his nose, not his tail,
So he scampered due north like the devil.
"This new mode of docking," the friar then said,
"I perceive doesn't make a horse trot ill;
And 'tis cheap—for he never can eat off his head
While I am engaged at the bottle,
Which goes gluggity, gluggity—glug—glug—glug."
The steed made a stop—in a pond he had got:
He was rather for drinking than grazing;
Quoth the friar, "'Tis strange, headless horses should trot;
But to drink with their tails is amazing!"
Turning round to see whence this phenomenon rose,
In the pond fell this son of a pottle.
Quoth he, "The head's found, for I'm under his nose;
I wish I were over a bottle,
Which goes gluggity, gluggity—glug—glug—glug."
Anonymous.