Keep everyone busy preparing winter clothing for the negroes—send for the overseer and tell him that it is my particular wish that he should, as soon as the seeding is finished, plough the large field around Sinaugh's house. Tell him to have the wheat threshed out. Adieu. Kiss little Susan for me, and believe me,
Your affectionate husband,
John H. Peyton.
P. S.—Miss Nicholson is here and well.
same to same.
Harrisonburg, Feb. 18, 1824.
My Dear Ann:
I was exceedingly gratified to get your affectionate letter of the 16th inst., written in that calm spirit of fortitude and resignation which convinces me that you take a right view of our late misfortune (supposed to be the loss of a child). I was fearful until I received your letter that you would be uneasy at my detention here, and am delighted that you are acquiring patience and learning to submit with composure to the inevitable. When you have learnt well these practical lessons you will be much better prepared to encounter the trials and disappointments of life, and nothing is truer than that all mankind must and will experience calamities. When we are prosperous we should always look for a reverse of fortune, and when we are in adversity we should recollect that it is the common lot of humanity. No one ever yet enjoyed uninterrupted happiness, and those who have most nearly approached it, are the sober, the virtuous, and industrious. The indolent are always unhappy and nearly always vicious. If you wish to be happy attend to the duties of your household—these will give you exercise and exercise will insure you health of body and mind. When the mistress takes an interest in domestic affairs—sees that the servants do their duty, that the house is neat and in order; that regular hours are kept by all, in a word, when good house wifery prevails, it affords more real happiness to the well regulated mind of the mistress than any, or all of the so-called fashionable amusements of the gay world. Such a house wife cannot fail to be loved at home and respected abroad.
No one is exempt from trouble, mental or physical, and the weight of both may seem at times bearing you to the ground, but take heart and the sum of your enjoyment will always outweigh your troubles. The Almighty in his infinite wisdom, mercy and goodness, has so constituted our minds, that past pleasures and enjoyments can always be vividly recalled to our recollection, past sufferings with difficulty, and seldom in detail. I would advise you to attempt by all means to divert your attention from your own person and surroundings, to other objects. The providence of God has surrounded us with objects of improving distraction, by which we may be led to think of Him. The same hand that strews pleasures in your way, has left no situation, however painful or disagreeable, where an antidote to your distress has not been placed within reach. You must, however, rouse yourself and seek for it. We constantly meet persons who complain that everything goes wrong with them, while with another "whatsoever he doeth prospers." This striking difference is generally to be accounted for, not by the doctrine of chances, but by a reference to the temper and character of the respective parties. Imprudence, or ill temper, for instance, will either mar the success of any project, or present it in a distorted and unfavorable aspect.
It must not be forgotten that this advice comes from your best friend, from one who has had large experience and who has made the springs of human action much his study.
What a field of rational enjoyment is opening before you in little Susan. You can watch the shooting idea, can restrain any exuberance, instil in her right principles, make her reverence virtue, detest vice. It is astonishing how soon good principles may be made to take root, and bad ones be eradicated. Never tell her, or suffer others to tell her she is beautiful. If she is so she will find it out too soon. Teach her to place her claims to distinction upon good sense, good principles, modesty, delicacy, affectionate deportment to her parents—respectful behavior to all. Let her respect herself and respect others. Then she will be in the widest and best sense a lady. It is astonishing how early in life the temper of children begins to be formed, and consequently how soon that important part of the business of education, which consists in the training of the mind to habits of discipline and submission, may be commenced. "I wish very much to consult you about the education of my little girl," said a lady some years since to a friend, "who is now just three years old." "Madam," replied the friend, "you are at least two years late in applying to me on the subject." Lose no time in instilling the principles of unhesitating obedience and thus, lay the foundation of paternal authority, while teaching your children self-control, self-denial, and how to gain a mastery over their passions. Warn her of the trials and difficulties, which more or less come to us all, but especially to the careless and indifferent.