Inexperienced and anxious Young Mistress. "The new housemaid, Maria, is a Roman Catholic but I hope you will not allow any religious controversy in the servants' hall."
Cook (with much dignity). "You needn't have any fear, my lady. In really 'igh class families religion is never mentioned!"
SPRING-CLEANING HINTS
(With acknowledgments to the "World and his Wife")
HOW TO MAKE OLD PICTURES LOOK NEW.
Many houses have pictures darkened with age which only need a little drastic treatment to make them as fresh and bright as new oleographs. The surface should first be soaked in a strong solution of hydrochloric acid and then rubbed with an old nail-brush. Any paint that should chance to be removed can easily be supplied by a local artist for a few pence. We heard of a Sir Joshua Reynolds which was treated like this the other day in its owner's absence, and on his return was mistaken by him for a Christmas supplement.
TO REVIVE KID.
Give the kid a stiff brandy-and-soda.