Mrs. Boreham at Home (Amateur Theatricals).—Sir Pompey Bedell. “Allow me to congratulate you, Mrs. Boreham, on a most successful entertainment! I have never set foot inside a theatre myself, I am proud to say, nor attended even private theatricals before—such things are not in my line! But I can honestly assure you that I have rarely seen histrionic ability more consummate, or a dramatic performance more exceptionally complete in every respect, than that which it has been our truly enviable privilege to witness this evening!”
An Amendment.—Vera. “What must I do about the Billsomes’ dance? I dislike the Billsomes, and I don’t want to go.”
Phillis. “Well, say you regret you are unable.”
Vera. “Wouldn’t it be more truthful to say I am unable to regret?”
It’s an East Wind that blows Nobody Good.—“Here comes the carriage, Maud! Fancy having to go and pay calls in such weather! It’s enough to give one one’s death of cold!”
“Worse than that, mother! Everybody’s sure to be in!”