First Tripper (in French Picture Gallery). "What O! 'Erb! What price this?"

Gardien (who quite understands him). "Pardon, M'sieur, eet is not 'Watteau,' and eet is not for sale!"


Tourist expostulates: "Oh—h, come! Them seegar is poor le—le—le—foomigaseong de mor-mem—yer fool!"


A ROMAN HOLIDAY

On the Appian Way

We are with a guide, voluble after the fashion of guides all the world over, and capable of speaking many languages execrably. His English, no doubt, is typical of the rest. "Datt-e building dere," he says, "is de Barze of Caracalla."