"Sir," he cried triumphantly, "I have news, great news!"

"Well?" said the general.

"Yes, it is a well, a well of natural petroleum, in fact, which I have discovered not half-a-mile away!"

The general clasped his hand, while the army roared themselves hoarse with delight. And, an hour later, only a faint flicker of dust on the horizon showed where the expedition was scurrying towards the doomed enemy.


THE PENALTY OF FAME

Small Boy (with shrill voice).

"'Fightin'—with—the Sev'nth—Royal Fu-siliers—