Master Douglas. Oh, mother always makes us do nasty things and things we don't like.
Master Tommy's Receipts.—(The Fair Weather Barometer.) This is a pleasing and simple experiment. The mercury is removed, and divided in equal portions between the cat, the parrot next door, and the interior of grandpapa's forty-guinea repeater. This may cause some local disturbance, but the barometer, relieved of undue pressure, and set at "very dry," may be relied on to indicate, without further attention, permanent fair weather.
At the Board School.—Inspector. Now, can any of you children state what is likely to be the future of China?
One Maiden (after a pause). Please sir, father says that China's like him.
Inspector. Like him! What do you mean?
The Maiden. Sure to be broken by the force of circumstances.
[Class dismissed immediately.