Lady. "Oh, thank you very much, Giles; but you surely forget that you lost your wife in the spring and broke your leg in the summer."
Giles. "Yes, but t'other leg's all right, and as for paw Soosan, it might have been I to be took instead."
Vicar (who has introduced "Gregorian" tones into his service). "Well, Mr. Rogers, how did you like our music? Tradition says, you know, that those psalm tunes are the original ones composed by King David." Flippant Parishioner. "Really? Then I no longer wonder why Saul threw his javelin at him!"
The Vicar. "I'm surprised at you, Miggs. Why, look at me. I can go into the town without coming back intoxicated." Miggs. "Yesh, zur, but Oi be so popular!" (Hic.)