In "playing through the green" with my "brassie" I was seen
At most dismal disadvantage on that miserable day;
He pointed through the rushes with cock-eyed, sardonic spleen,—
I followed his squint guidance, and I struck a yard away;
But, oh! 'twas worst of all, when I tried to hole the ball.
Oh, the ogre! How he squinted at that crisis of the game!
His hideous strabismus held me helpless, a blind thrall
Shattered my nerves completely, put my skill to open shame.
That squint would, I am sure, have upset the solar system—