"Nil Desperandum," Beckenham.—The best stimulant during match play is a beaten-up egg in a claret glass of sloe gin. The eggs are best carried in the pocket of your club-bag.
A. Flubb, Woking.—No, it is not good form to pay your caddie in stamps.
Alcibiades, Wembley Park.—If you must play golf on Sunday, I call it nothing short of hypocritical to go down to the links in a tall hat.
Between Friends.—Mr. Spooner, Q.C. (a Neophyte). "This is my ball, I think?"
Colonel Bunting (an adept). "By Jove, that's a jolly good 'lie'!"
Mr. Spooner. "Really, Bunting, we're very old friends, of course. But I do think you might find a pleasanter way of pointing out a perfectly unintentional mistake!"