The Irishman in Scotland.—Sorr, there is a river that requires milk an’ sugar before ye’d dhrink a dhrop of it? What is it? Sure ’tis the river Tay.
A Conundrum made by a Little Boy only Seven Years Old.—Why is an umbrella like a Scottish shower?—Because the moment it rains it’s missed.
Scene—A Scottish Estate. The New Heir has run down to see the property.
The Heir. “I sha’n’t be able to come and settle here just yet, McTavish, as I’m ordered out to South Africa, but——”
McTavish (his Factor—with feeling). “A’m sorry,—A’m varra sorry to hear that”—(the Heir is rather touched)—“because ye’ll understan’, if onything was to happen to ye, A doot the estate couldna stan’ two succession duties so close.”