Divorce is easy, inexpensive, and very prevalent; and it is no uncommon thing to hear that a man has had ten or eleven wives and that a woman has had eight or nine husbands. For an angry man to say the words, "I divorce you," and to repeat them three times, swearing an oath by the Prophet, is enough to oblige the object of his wrath to leave his house; carrying with her a bed, a pillow, a coverlet, and a saucepan, together with the clothes which she had from her own family at her marriage. She returns to her father's house, or to the nearest relation she has, should he be dead, until another marriage is arranged for her.
Among the richer classes divorce seldom occurs; and, if the wife has children and devotes herself to the comfort of her husband, she may feel her position tolerably secure. Should she fall ill, however, it is rare that a husband permits her to remain in his house, for he has not promised to cherish her in sickness and in health. He will send her to her own family till he sees how the illness will turn; and, more than probably, she will be told in less than a month that she is divorced, and that her husband has married another. How often in our Palestine hospitals do we try to comfort and soothe the poor sick women in their feverish anxiety to get well, for fear of this dreaded Damocles' sword falling on their unhappy heads!
Among the poorer classes divorce is extremely prevalent. If a woman has no child, she is immediately divorced, and is returned to her own family, who arrange for a second marriage, generally in about ten days from the time she is divorced. Should she again have no child, her lot will indeed be a sad one. She must then be content to be the wife of some blind or crippled man, who, perhaps, will also exact a sum of money from her relations for his charity in marrying her. If a woman be divorced after she has had children, she must leave them with the husband, to be probably harshly treated by her successor or successors. If the father dies, the children are supported by his brothers or relations, while the widow marries again. It is seldom that a widow is permitted to take a child, or children, to her new home. There is no difficulty in providing for orphan girls; they are much sought after in marriage, for the law excuses a young man from foreign military service if he can prove that his wife is an orphan. This means that he would not be able to leave her alone during his absence. Such orphans are generally taken into the houses of their future husbands as little tiny girls of four or five years old, where they are trained by the mother-in-law, and grow up as daughters. By this means the husband is exempt from paying any sum of money for his bride.
We must not forget that the marriages of Moslems are wholly without affection, and that the only way in which the husband can enforce obedience from his ignorant and listless wife is by the law of divorce. She will obey him and work for him simply from the fear of being turned away. When a woman has been divorced four or five times, she finds a difficulty in getting a husband; for the report spreads that it "takes two to make a quarrel," that her tongue is too sharp and her temper too short. I have been asked what becomes eventually of the woman who has been frequently divorced. Finally she remains with the old or very poor man who has married her in her old age. Or, possibly, if she is a widow with a grown-up son, he will support her until death relieves him of what he feels to be only a burden. The insecurity of a Moslem wife's position quite precludes any improvement in herself, her household arrangements, or in her children's training. She does not care to sew, or to take an interest in her husband's work. She does not economize, or try to improve his position, for fear that, if he should find himself with a little spare money, he would immediately enlarge his borders by taking another wife! Therefore, a Moslem woman's house is always poor-looking and untidy. She keeps her husband's clothes the same, that he may not be able to associate with wealthy men and envy their pleasures. Here we see the wide gulf between Christianity and Islam. The wife, whom God gave to be the "help," and whose price is far above rubies, has been debased by the prophet Mohammed, into the "chattel" to be used, and when worn out, thrown away!
The Christian woman's home in Palestine is generally clean and tidy. Her interests are identical with those of her husband. She is glad to work to help the man, that the position of both may be improved.
I do not think the rich man ill-treats his wife. I have found him invariably kind and indulgent. In Palestine the women have plenty of liberty. It is a mistake to say that they are shut up. To begin with, they live in large houses with gardens and courtyards enclosed. They go out visiting one another, to the public baths, and to the cemetery regularly once a week, where they meet and commune with the spirits of departed friends.
The girls go to school regularly. The richer Moslems have resident governesses for their daughters, and they are eager for education. There is no doubt that the customs are changing. Education is raising the woman, and the man will naturally appreciate the change and will welcome companionship and culture. To educate both men and women is the best way of checking the evil system of polygamy, and its daughter, divorce. Polygamy was promulgated by the Prophet as a bribe to the carnal man. Without that carnal weapon I doubt if Islam had numbered a thousand followers! It ministers to self-gratification in this world, and promises manifold more of the same license in the world to come. It is small wonder that when we speak of a clean heart and a right spirit without which we cannot enter the spiritual kingdom, our words are unintelligible. But that is our theme. Holiness, without which no man can see the Lord! These poor women are so ignorant. They know that sin has entered into the world, but they know not Him who has destroyed the power of sin. They have never heard the words, "Fear not, I have redeemed thee." ...
A Village School in Syria