When the cunning young mug-lumb’rer’s not mug-lumb’ring,

When the shirker doesn’t fail to come to time,

Still the Secretary mustn’t be caught slumb’ring,

Nor waiting for the distant village chime.

When the players fall a-wrangling with each other,

Or the Referee’s dry sherry short has run,

Oh, take one consideration with another,

His official lot is not a happy one,

Ah!

When the Secretary’s duty’s to be done,