I’m a genuine philanthropist—all other sorts are sham.

Each stupid freak of Fortune and each soc-i-al defect

By my lectures and my volumes I endeavour to correct;

To all their little grievances I ope the people’s eyes,

And pretty plans to crucify the landlords I devise.

I love my fellow creatures—I do all the good I can—

Yet Property declares that I’m a disagreeable man!

And I can’t think why!

To Smith and to Ricardo I’ve a withering reply;

Malthusians I always do my best to mortify;