F thou wouldst stand on Etna's burning brow,
With smoke above, and roaring flames below;
And gaze adown that molten gulf reveal'd
Till thy soul shudder'd, and thy senses reel'd;—
If thou wouldst beard Niagara in his pride,
Or stem the billows of Propontic tide;
Scale all alone some dizzy Alpine haut,
And shriek "Excelsior!" amidst the snow;—
Wouldst tempt all deaths, all dangers that may be,
Perils by land, and perils on the sea,—
This vast round world, I say, if thou wouldst view it,
Then why the dickens don't you go and do it?
H. Cholmondeley Pennell, Puck on Pegasus.
AM saddest when I sing; so are those who hear me. They are sadder even than I am.
C. F. Browne, Artemus Ward's Lecture.
N ape with a pliable thumb and big brain,
When the gift of the gab he had managed to gain,
As a lord of creation established his reign,
Which nobody can deny.
But I'm sadly afraid, if we do not take care,
A relapse to low life may our prospects impair,
So of beastly propensities let us beware,
Which nobody can deny.
Their lofty position our children may lose,
And, reduced to all-fours, must then narrow their views,
Which would shortly unfit them for wearing our shoes,
Which nobody can deny.
Their vertebræ next might be taken away,
When they'd sink to an oyster, or insect, some day,
Or the pitiful part of a polypus play,
Which nobody can deny.
Lord Neaves, Songs and Verses.