"Begorry, an' I bet you twenty-five dollars that He don't carry Pittsburg."
JOHNNY'S CONSCIENCE
A teacher in one of our city schools defined conscience as "something within you that tells you when you have done wrong."
"Oh, yes," said a little lad at the end of the room, "I had it once last summer after I'd eaten green apples, but they had to send for a doctor."
NOT TO BE DISSUADED
A number of salesmen were discussing the subject of traveling through the South.
"I have often wondered," said one of them, "how those boys, who take your hats in the dining-rooms of southern hotels and place them in a rack without checks know which hat to give you. If thought I would try and fool one. One day when I had finished lunch, and the boy had handed me my hat, I tried it on and pretended it was a misfit.
"'This is not my hat,' I said, but he was ready with his answer.
"'Dat may not be youah hat, sah,' he replied calmly, 'but it am de hat what you gib me when you come in.'"
AS LITTLE AS POSSIBLE