"But, Casey," asked one, "how am Oi to know if yez be there?"
"Why, Patr-rick, if Oi get ther-re fur-ist Oi'll make a chalk mar-rk on the wall beside th' dure."
"A good plan, faith," said Patrick; "an' Casey, if Oi get ther-re fur-ist Oi'll rub the mar-rk out so that yez'll know."
MORE BULLS
This is submitted as an ideal example of the Irish "bull":
Roger: "Timothy, yez is dr-unk."
Timothy: "Roger, Oi'm not--an' if 'Oi was sober-r yez would not dare to say so."
Roger: "An' Timothy, if yez was sober-r yez'd have sinse enough to know ye wuz dr-runk."
THE INTELLIGENT GOAT
Three colored men were discussing the intelligence of different animals. One favored the dog; another, the horse; but old Peter Jackson said, "In my opinion de goat am de 'telligentest critter livin'. De goat kin read, I saw him do it. Once I wuz walkin' down street dressed in mah best suit, an' wearin' mah new plug hat. When I got down on de main street, I seed a billboa'd on which it said: 'Chew Jackson's Plug.' A goat wuz standin' thar when I passed an' when I wuz about ten feet away he must hab recognized me, for de next thing I knew, I went sailin' in de mud. When I looked 'roun' dat goat wuz chewin' mah plug hat for all he wuz worth. Gem'men, da is no question in mah mind about de 'telligence ob de goat. He am a wondah."