The American Joe Miller: A Collection of Yankee Wit and Humor - Unknown

PAGE

Absence of Mind, [50], [52], [85]
Abstraction, [187]
Adopting the Other Course, [158]
Advantage of Burning Two Candles, [2]
Advice to Doctors, [179]
Advice to Parents, [49]
After Joining Church, [43]
Agreeable Customer, An, [19]
Agreeing with all the Girls, [134]
Agricultural Returns, [202]
Aids to Memory, [184]
All-Healing, [200]
All Human, [87]
All Well, [41]
Amende Honourable, [177]
American Competition, [152]
American Curiosity, [176]
American Definitions, [152]
American Estimate of their Clergy, [9]
American Help, An, [174]
American Notion of Villany, [94]
American Platform, [86]
American Proverbs, [207]
American Similes, [207]
American Soil, [149]
"And That's a Fact", [104]
Angler Caught, The, [201]
Another Burst of Eloquence, [109]
Another Discovery, [96]
Answered at Once, [189]
Answering an Advertisement, [168]
Antediluvian Diet, [61]
Any Better than None, [154]
Any Relations, [140]
Appropriate Gift, An, [115]
Apt Pupil, An, [205]
Artistic Execution, [146]
Awkward Coincidence, [95]
Baby Story, A, [16]
Bachelorism a Luxury, [22]
Backwoods Conversation, [173]
Big Puff, A, [67]
Billings, Josh., Insures his Life, [83]
Billings, Josh., Sayings of, [99], [195]-[196]
Billings, Josh., on Horses, [175]
Billy Bray, [28]
Black Bull, A, [160]
Blind Phrenologist of St, Louis, [135]
Bonnets, [194]
Borrowing the Baby, [203]
Boxes and Pit, [204]
"Braggin' saves Advertisin'", [113]
Breakfast in Bed, [129]
Brigham Young's Wives, [91]
Bright and Blue, [186]
Brother of Four Million Children, [63]
Bucolic Stupidity, [207]
"Bus" in the Cars, A, [132]
Business and Affliction, [5]
Candid Parson, A, [12]
Canine Resemblance, [69]
Captain's Pudding, The, [123]
Catching, [184]
Caught Unawares, [32]
Cause and Effect, [182]
Cautious Witness, A, [72]
Changes, [141]
Charged and Discharged, [202]
Chasing a Locomotive, [135]
Cheap Treat, A, [83]
Chickens in Tennessee, The, [21]
Citizen of all the States, A, [30]
Claiming Exemption, [122]
Clay, Henry, [203]
Clergyman and the Lawyer, [110]
Climacteric Sublimity, [107]
Close Witness, A, [88]
Cold Picture, A, [37]
Colonel answered, The, [12]
Colt's Arms v. Colt's Legs, [126]
Columbus and the Egg, [117]
Columbus's Discovery, [106]
Complimentary, [168]
Conclusive, [114]
Condensed Novel, A, [25]
Conditional Forgiveness, [87]
Confession of a Clergyman, [95]
Confidence Necessary, [189]
Cool Customer, A, [22]
Coolness, [106]
Cords of Hymen, The, [82]
Corking up Daylight, [16]
Critical, [162]
Criminal didn't see it, [72]
Crockett, Colonel, and the 'Coon, [199]
Crockett, Colonel, [202]
Crooked Stick, The, [115]
Cross Purposes, [20]
Couldn't help it, in fact, [43]
Couldn't make an Impression, [108]
Couple of Reasons too many, A, [3]
Cuff's Cabin, [157]
Cure for Fainting, [82]
Curing Two Afflictions, [164]
Curiosities of American Speech, [55]
Curious Event, [57]
Cute Expedient, [185]
Cutting, [168]
Damaging the Engine, [128]
Darkie's Wish, The, [168]
Date Wanted, The, [105]
"Dat's de Mystery", [126]
Debt of Nature, The, [160]
"De Dissolution of Coparsnips", [17]
Delicate Cut, A, [128]
Democrats v. Republicans, [102]
Demosthenes not Dead, [33]
Diamond Cut Diamond, [54]
Didn't care, then, if he did, [140]
Dinner, but no Breakfast, [159]
Disconsolate, [147]
Disinterested Lieutenant, A, [122]
Distant Friend, A, [167]
Domestic Economy, [50]
Double Difficulty, A, [143]
Doubtful, [144]
Dow, Junior, [84]
Do you Smoke?, [78]
Drawing the Long Bow, [7]
Dying Soldier and his Mother, [68]
Dry Joke in a Dry Goods' Store, A, [26]
Dull Members, [171]
Early Rising in Connecticut, [1]
Eclipsing Himself, [151]
Editorial Fix, [110]
Editorial Horse, An, [102]
Editorial Tribulations, [54]
Editors Exchanging Compliments, [92]
Editors' Wives, [142]
Effective Remonstrance, [147]
Effect of Eloquence, The, [80]
Egg "Brof", [3]
Either Way will do, [96]
Elbow-Room Scarce, [3]
Emerson and Parker, [101]
English Grammar, [40]
Enthusiastic Newsvendor, [119]
Epigram on Lincoln, [149]
Everett and Judge Story, [163]
Excessive Politeness, [53]
Excuse for Drinking, [142]
Exempt decidedly, [97]
Extraordinary Absence of Mind, [103]
Extraordinary Crow, [49]
Extraordinary Motto, [52]
Eye to Business, An, [130]
Failed for a Good Reason, [19]
Fair Retort, A, [161]
Falling in Love, [171]
Familiar Acquaintance, [151]
Fancy her Feelings, [85]
Feeling her Way, [18]
Female Admirable Crichton, [102]
Fine Stream, A, [196]
Fine Writing, [107]
"Fire at the Crisis", [173]
Firm Foundation, [187]
First Marriage, The, [42]
Five Outs and One In, [151]
Floating Population, A, [102]
Fond of Society, [197]
Forcible Eviction, [204]
Forensic Eloquence, [18]
Forest-Born Orator, A, [70]
Forlorn Hope, [146]
4-tunate Young Man, A, [2]
Four Points of a Case, [2]
Franklin, Dr., [161]
Franklin and Hancock, [203]
Friendly Notice, [185]
Gallant Correction, [187]
Gem, A, [165]
General no Pattern, The, [175]
German Wines, [175]
Getting down a Ladder, [98]
Gin and Water, [205]
Gone Home, [137]
Good Eyesight, [172]
Governor and the Justice, The, [119]
Graham System, The, [13]
Grandpa's Spectacles, [71]
Grant, General, [172]
Great Scarcity, [123]
Great Traveller, A, [136]
Grieving for a Wife, [105]
Grim Welcome, [22]
Guarded Answer, A, [78]
Habitual Thirst, [170]
Habits of a Great Man, [28]
Half Guilty, [177]
Hairs, not Bristles, [60]
Happiest of Vowels, The, [117]
Hard Feathers, [163]
Hard Hearing, [187]
Hard Lying, [4]
Hard Scrabble, [90]
Hard up [73], [144]
Having the Coffin Handy, [41]
He had him that time, [17]
Heady, [172]
Heavenly Bodies, The, [117]
Heavy Top-Dressing, [60]
Height of Meanness, The, [105]
Hen Persuaders, [70]
Her Marriage Gift, [196]
Her Poor Jerry, [130]
Highly Probable, [103]
His First Step, [64]
His Reasons for Leaving, [133]
His Wife's Cousin, [66]
Holding the Stakes, [74]
Homely Flag of Truce, [16]
Horrified Dandy, A, [27]
Hot Pies, [57]
Hotel Accommodation in the South, [81]
Hotel Rules at the "Diggins", [79]
Household Words, [132]
How a "Copperhead" was Shaved, [10]
How Ale strengthened him, [67]
How Mr. Lincoln shakes Hands, [89]
How Sam was Caught, [84]
How to do Business, [97]
How to get a Seat, [95]
How to go Mad, [101]
Huggin', [192]
Human Nature, [138]
Hunting up a Soft Place, [39]
I would if I could, [90]
Illegible Manuscripts, [88]
"I'm the Baggage", [20]
In Black and White, [77]
In Love with the Devil, [89]
Incident and Epigram, An, [137]
Inducement to Young People, [102]
Inducement Unnecessary, [148]
Infant Teacher, An, [206]
Infantile Idea of Distance, [126]
Inflammable and Dangerous, [51]
Ingenious Boot-Black, [35]
Inquiring Mind, An, [23]
Insinuating Rejoinder, [156]
Interesting Announcement, [142]
Interesting Experiment, [99]
Interesting to the Parties concerned, [14]
Interrupting the Sermon, [84]
Irish Bull at Bull's Run, An, [131]
Irish Exhortation, [89]
Irish Negro, [99]
It follows, [175]
Jefferson, Thomas, [203]
Jemmy O'Neil and President Jackson, [61]
Jew D'Esprit, A, [157]
Job's Patience—as viewed by a Lady, [38]
John and the Widdah, [150]
Joke by Jenkins, A, [104]
Joke by the President, [143]
Jonathan's Guess, [178]
Jonathan of All Trades, [167]
Judge and his Coachman, The, [75]
Judgment of Solomon, The, [6]
Just got Married, [137]
Keen and Significant, [85]
Keeping a Secret, [139]
Kind and Sympathetic, [138]
Kissing by Proxy, [146]
Kissing in Wisconsin, [13]
Knocking at the Church Door, [24]
Knowing and Not Knowing, [197]
Knowing Contraband, A, [172]
Knowing Juryman, A, [15]
Laconic, [184]
Lagging Compliment, A, [121]
Lapse of Ages, The, [111]
Last Compliment, The, [161]
Latest Dog Story, [147]
Latest Way, The, [136]
Law of Compensation, The, [108]
Learned Members of the American Legislature, The, [11]
Lee, Gen., and a Son of Erin, [125]
Lee, Gen., to General Meade, [158]
Legal Advice under Singular Circumstances, [79]
Legal Toast, A, [86]
Legislation, [194]
Letter R, The, [130]
Letter S, The, [144]
Libellous Assertion, [98]
Life in Kentucky, [207]
Lincoln on Nigger Mathematics, [37]
Literature, [203]
Littles, [58]
Loafer's Hat, The, [160]
Lobster Salad, [43]
Logs Wanted, [50]
Logic of Congress, [126]
Lone Nigger, A, [97]
Long and Short of it, [106]
Longfellow and Longworth, [141]
Long Livers, [188]
Look on this Picture and on this, [50]
Looking for a Situation, [77]
Love-Letter Ink, [163]
Lovers' Leap, The, [168]
Low-necked Frocks, [100]
Luminous Evidence, [68]
Lying at the Top, The, [113]
"Mails" and Females, [107]
Major Downing in London, [154]
Making a Man's Coffin before his Death, [7]
Marriage Notices, [16]
Marriage and Single Blessedness, [69]
Meade, Gen., to Gen. Lee, [158]
Meat Baby, A, [110]
Mighty Thick Fog, A, [57]
Mild Assertion, A, [185]
Military Tactics, [145]
Military Veracity of the North, [3]
Millennium at Hand, The, [195]
Milwaukee Eloquence, [60]
Minister's Reception, The, [108]
Mixing the Babies, [30]
Model Advertisements, [111]
Modern Definitions, [187]
Modest Linendraper, A, [137]
Modesty, [199]
Monster Punch-Bowl, [188]
Mooted Question, A, [97]
More Copy, [189]
More Laughable than Logical, [107]
Most too Sudden, [140]
Much Virtue in an "If", [167]
My Pew, Sir!, [6]
Naming Children in America, [106]
Nature and Art, [155], [205]
Natur's Balances, [149]
Natural Mistake, [203]
"Naygers," The, [183]
Nearing it by Degrees, [205]
Negro Sermon, [71]
Nerve of Feeling, [200]
Nest Egg, The, [44]
New, if not True, [164]
New Dish, A, [160]
Newspaper Borrowers, To, [34]
New Way to affix a Stamp, [115]
Niagara Falls from Four Points of View, [126]
Nice Girl, A, [48]
Nigger Explanation, [157]
No Doubt, [38]
No Justice in that Court, [140]
No Patients Living, [72]
No Place like Home, [128]
No Vices, [173]
Nonsense about Love, [144]
Not Exactly, [201]
Not for Want, [121]
Not Particular, [112]
Not so, [47]
Not to be Done, [32]
Not to be wondered at, [76]
Not Willing to Die, [130]
Note by the Editor, [147]
Novel Commentary by a Parson, [42]
Novel Effect of a Second Marriage, [103]
Novel Hint from the Pulpit, [86]
Novel Proposition, [141]
Novel Telegraphic Message, [129]
Novel Verdict, A, [94]
Obeying Orders, [201]
Obituary Notice, [206]
Objecting to Missions, [64]
Obstinacy Cured, [200]
Ode on Gas, An, [54]
Odd Excuse for not being Hung, [19]
Odd Names, [79]
Of course not, [101]
Ohio Democracy, The, [48]
"Old Brains", [119]
Old Hen and Chickens, The, [21]
Old King's Arm, The, [89]
Ole Harry and Ole Nick, [46]
One of the Press, [109]
Only the Eleventh, [1]
"Open Thy Cupboard to Me", [148]
Openness of Countenance, [74]
Origin of "Some Punkin", [62]
Original Brother Jonathan, The, [116]
Other Impediment, The, [178]
Other Side, The, [91]
Our Bob, [127]
Out-Yankeed, [10]
Oysters, [186]
"Paddle your own Canoe", [34]
Painful Necessity, [189]
Painting to the Life, [117]
Paper Collars, The, [182]
Parental Advice, [42]
Parting Friends, [97]
Passing the Cow, [204]
Pay your Postage, [15]
Perils of the Fourth Estate, [111]
Perpetual Motion, [152]
Personal, [95]
Pete's Expectations, [77]
Pickled Elephant, [183]
Picture Dealing, [179]
Pile of Jokes, A, [206]
Pithy Letter, [13]
Plain enough, [109]
Plain Spoken, [165]
Plump Question, [81]
Poetical Editor, A, [72]
Poetical Patchwork, [112]
Poetry and Prose, [138]
Poets, [205]
Pointed Retort, [129]
Polite Man, A, [106]
Politics, [172]
Poor Couple, A, [102]
Poor Preaching, [169]
Popping Corn, [191]
Popping the Question, [70], [165]
Powerful Sermon, [192]
"Preach Small", [4]
Precept and Practice, [161]
Presented at Court, [162]
President Jackson, [61]
President Lincoln, Epigram on, [149]
President Lincoln on Nigger Mathematics, [37]
President Lincoln's First Political Speech, [151]
President and the Marshal, The, [156]
President's Voice, The, [10]
Presidential Puns, [73]
Pretence, [148]
Pretended Pelham, A, [159]
Printers' Mistakes, [108]
Printer's Toast, A, [154]
Profit and Loss, [182]
Profitless Teaching, [120]
Prompt Reply, A, [84]
Proverbs, [91]
Providing for Bills, [125]
Putting a Good Face on it, [200]
Putting forward his Creed, [47]
Pugnacious Ram, The, [27]
Puzzled, [181]
Puzzled Judge, A, [34]
Quadruplicated Pun, [207]
Quaker's Excuse for Firing, [62]
Quaker Woman's Sermon, [128]
Qualifications for a Parson, [103]
Queer Cup of Coffee, A, [7]
Queer Queries, [78]
Question for Astronomers, A, [104]
Question for Question, [166]
Quizzing a Witness, [155]
Quoting his Father, [118]
Rare Printer, A, [51]
Rat Story, A, [78]
Rather Cute, [86]
Real Heavy Gale, A, [114]
Reasonable Instinct, [162]
Reason for Dear Cream, A, [49]
Reasons for not Joining Church, [89]
Reasons enough, [100]
Rebuke, A, [188]
Remarkable Chambermaid, [156]
Remarkable Dream, [43]
Remarkable Man, A, [52]
Remarkable Skipper, [188] Remarkable Tenacity of Life, 8
Remarkably Sociable, [180]
Receipt in Full, A, [153]
Returned Soldier's Letter, [73]
Rivalling Nature, [95]
Rough Bedfellow, A, [163]
Sad Scarcity of Paper, [105]
Saddest Sight, The, [38]
Salary not so much an Object, [124]
Sambo and Cuffee, [54]
Sambo's Suspicion, [127]
Sam's Soul, [9]
Same Drunk, [184]
Satisfactory Reason, A, [88]
Saved the Leather, [194]
Saving the Truth, [156]
Sayings Wise and Witty, [195]
Scene in an American Court, [24]
Schoolmaster Abroad, The, [167]
Scientific Agreement, [38]
Scipio's Wife, [68]
Scripture Names, [22]
Securing his Trunk, [26]
Self-evident Knowledge, [199]
Sensations of a Down-Easter, [141]
Sensible Woman, A, [96]
Setting the Time, [180]
Settling the Wine Bill, [145]
Sharp Child, [80]
Sharp Shooting, [1]
Shedding their Last Blood, [129]
"Shell in de Stove," A, [53]
Shrewd Nigger, A, [174]
Short and Expressive, [83]
Simile, A, [150]
Similes, [208]
Simmons on Life, [185]
Simplicity, [15]
Slashing Article, A, [94]
Slick's, Sam, Description of a Teetotaller, [151]
Slick's, Sam, Geology, [172]
Slick, Sam, on Happiness, [121]
Slick's, Sam, Wise Saws, [143]
Slight Difference, [177]
Small Loaves, [1]
Small Waists and Tight Lacing, [157]
Smart Railway Employé, [63]
Smiles, [146]
Snip, [173]
Snorers, To, [35]
Snoring in Church, [163]
Snubbing a Lawyer, [98]
So Humane, [113]
Soap coming Handy, [25]
Soldier's Farewell, A, [76]
Solemn Hour, A, [90]
Solid Reason, A, [186]
Something like a Good Shot, [51]
Sonnet instead of a Bonnet, A, [21]
Sound Advice, [15]
Spare Girl, A, [115]
Sparing his Feelings, [101]
Speaking his Deep Emotions, [59]
Spectacles and Bible Reading, [52]
Splendid Firing, [202]
Spiritualism Extraordinary, [59]
Squashed, [186]
Stage-Struck Hoosier, [75]
"Steal Pen," The, [206]
Steam Defined, [132]
Stoning Stephen, [170]
Story with a Moral, [18]
Strange Peculiarities, [22]
Stretch of Imagination, [179]
Striking Definition, [103]
Striking Effect of a Strike, [28]
Striking Lesson, A, [122]
Striking Resemblance, [150]
Strong Inducement, [131]
Stump Orator, A, [12]
Styling the Firm, [156]
Sublime and Ridiculous, [96]
Substituting one Treat for another, [78]
Sudden Declaration, [153]
Superfluous Testimonial, [73]
Sure of it, [179]
Suspecting the Shell, [63]
Swift Horse, A, [204]
Take Care of your Baggage, [152]
Taking his Patients for a Ride, [75]
Taking the Starch out, [80]
Tall Relations, [50]
Tall Talk, [130]
Talking-Match, [146]
Tart, [193]
Tearful Response, A, [159]
Thackeray and the Pirate's Daughter, [157]
Thanks to his Hens, [189]
That's a Good 'Un!, [14]
The House that Jeff. Built, [180]
The Late Floyd, [64]
The Reason Why, [110]
Things I should like to See, [165]
Thoughtful Mothers, [116]
Tight-fisted, [142]
Timely Warning, [169]
Tipping them Latin, [186]
Tired of his Boarding-House, [86]
To make Leeches bite, [184]
To make Sausages, [4]
To the Point, [52]
Too much Ice, [200]
Too Slow for Paradise, [13]
Tough Yankee, A, [117]
Transatlantic Matrimonial Advertisements, [29]
Treasure Trove, The, [8]
Tremendous Gale, [71]
True American Patriotism, [112]
True, if not New, [164]
True Politeness, [167]
Trump Card, A, [169]
Truth Wanted, [131]
Two Things made to be Lost, [100]
Two Things Unexpected, [152]
Unacceptable Gratitude, [17]
Undoubted Courage, [150]
Unkind Reminder, An, [107]
Unnecessary Apprehension, [96]
Used to it, [118]
Vegetable Head, A, [64]
Verdict of a Negro Jury, [114]
Very Civil War, [114]
Very Likely, [56]
Very Odd, that, [67]
Virginian Eloquence, [170]
Vocation, A, [154]
War Phrases, [197]
Ward's, Artemus, Courtship, [197]
Ward, A., on Reorganization, [153]
Ward, A., on the Negro, [62]
Ward, A., to the Prince of Wales, [124]
Ward Beecher's Preaching, [13]
Washington Irving, [154]
Way of the World, The, [23]
Webster, Daniel, [189]
Webster's, Daniel, Courtship, [162]
Webster, Daniel, and his Bills, [138]
Webster, Daniel, and William Wirt, [31]
Wedlock First Instituted, [121]
Western Neighbours, [98]
Western Obituary Notice, [46]
We wonder, too, [50]
Whale at Peas, A, [158]
What a Fine Woman is like, [131]
What he always did at Home, [41]
What he did the First Year, [11]
What Irishmen do!, [105]
What U. S. stands for, [118]
When the Boat started, [134]
When will they meet?, [194]
Where the Ducks went, [127]
"Where Warren fell", [9]
Whiskers and Kisses, [58]
Who Fiddled, [193]
Whose Fault was it?, [136]
Why the War goes on, [118]
Wise Fool, A, [119]
Wise Judge, A, [101]
Wise Saws by Sam Slick, [143]
With a Quill, [144]
Witty Aide-de-Camp, A, [155]
Witty Sentinel, A, [71]
Woman-ology, [45]
Wonderful, [144]
Wonderful, if True, [178]
"Wouldn't you like to know?", [44]
Writing to the Old Woman, [20]
Wrong Woman, The, [142]
Wrong Train, The, [37]
Yankee, The, [166]
Yankee's Autobiography, A, [36]
Yankee Brass, [76]
Yankee Factory Girls, [170]
Yankee Inquisitiveness, [176]
Yankee Modesty, [188]
Yankee Notion of Macbeth, [27]
Yankee Portrait of John Bull, [177]
Yankee Toasts, [66]
Young Jeff.'s Appetite, [6]
Young Lady's Sacrifice, A, [138]
Young Patriot, The, [32]
Your Fare, Miss, [133]
Youth Indignant, [188]

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