NOTICE.—The Turkish artillery is requested to refrain from wasting ammunition whilst our meals are being served.


PUBLIC NOTICE.—The Electric Elevator will not be working up the gullies for a while. Some cook stole the current to make a pudding.


KABA TEPE MUSEUM.—Come and see! A piece of long extinct Australian butter now being exhibited.

Admission.—One slice of bread.


BENEVOLENT HOME.—The Editor has established a home for lost newspapers and books. Any books or papers may be left there and no questions asked.


MEDICAL.—Men suffering from a feeling of fullness after eating, are requested to state where they got the extra rations from.