The Arabian Nights, Volume II of IV

by Unknown

Bakbarah at length yielded to the old woman’s arguments; and, without saying another word, he suffered the slave to conduct him to an apartment, where they painted his eyebrows red. They shaved his mustachios, and were absolutely going to shave his beard. But the easiness of my brother’s temper did not carry him quite so far as to suffer that. “Not a single stroke,” he exclaimed, “shall you take at my beard.” The slave represented to him, that it was of no use to have cut off his mustachios, if he would not also agree to lose his beard: that a hairy countenance did not at all coincide with the dress of a woman; and that she was astonished, that a man who was on the very point of possessing the most beautiful woman in Bagdad, should care for his beard. The old woman also joined with the slave, and added fresh reasons; she threatened my brother with being quite in disgrace with her mistress. In short, she said so much, that he at last permitted them to do what they wished.

As soon as they had dressed him like a woman, they brought him back to the young lady, who burst into so violent a fit of laughter at the sight of him, that she fell down on the sofa in which she was sitting. The slaves all began to clap their hands, so that my brother was put quite out of countenance. The young lady then got up, and continuing to laugh all the time, said, “After the complaisance you have shown to me, I should be guilty of a crime not to bestow my whole heart upon you; but it is necessary that you should do one thing more for love of me; it is only to dance before me as you are.” He obeyed; and the young lady and the slaves danced with him, laughing all the while, as if they were crazy. After they had danced for some time, they all threw themselves upon the poor wretch, and gave him so many blows, both with their hands and feet, that he fell down almost fainting. The old woman came to his assistance, and without giving him time to be angry at such ill-treatment, she whispered in his ear, “Console yourself, for you are now arrived at the conclusion of your sufferings, and are about to receive the reward for them. You have only one thing more to do,” added she, “and that is a mere trifle. You must know that my mistress makes it her custom, whenever she has drank a little, as she has done to-day, not to suffer any one she loves to come near her, unless they are stripped to their shirt. When they are in this situation, she takes advantage of a short distance, and begins running before them through the gallery, and from room to room, till they have caught her. This is one of her fancies. Now, at whatever distance from you she may start, you, who are so light and active, can easily overtake her. Undress yourself, therefore, quickly, and remain in your shirt, and do not make any difficulty about it.”

My brother had already carried his complying humour too far to stop at this. The young lady at the same time took off her robe in order to run with greater ease, and remained only in her drawers. When they were both ready to begin the race, the lady took the advantage of about twenty paces, and then started with wonderful celerity. My brother followed her with all his strength; but not without exciting the risibility of the slaves, who kept clapping their hands all the time. The young lady, instead of losing any of the advantage she had first taken, kept continually gaining ground of my brother. She ran round the gallery two or three times, then turned off down a long dark passage, where she saved herself by a turn of which my brother was ignorant. Bakbarah, who kept constantly following her, lost sight of her in this passage; and he was also obliged to run much slower, because it was so dark. He at last perceived a light, towards which he made all possible haste; he went out through a door, which was instantly shut upon him.

You may easily imagine what was his astonishment, at finding himself in the middle of a street inhabited by curriers. Nor were they less surprised at seeing him in his shirt, his eyebrows painted red, and without either beard or mustachios. They began to clap their hands, to hoot at him; and some even ran after him, and kept lashing him with strips of their leather. They then stopped him, and set him on an ass, which they accidentally met with, and led him through the city, exposed to the laughter and shouts of the mob.

To complete his misfortune, they led him through the street where the judge of the police lived, and this magistrate immediately sent to inquire into the cause of the uproar. The curriers informed him that they saw my brother, exactly in the state he then was, come out of the gate leading to the apartments of the women belonging to the grand vizier, which opened into their street. The judge then ordered the unfortunate Bakbarah, upon the spot, to receive a hundred strokes upon the soles of his feet, to be conducted without the city, and forbid him ever to enter it again.

This, Commander of the Faithful, said I to the caliph Mostanser Billah, is the history of my second brother, which I wished to relate to your majesty. He knew not, poor fellow, that the ladies of our great and powerful lords amuse themselves by making such fun as this with any young man, who is silly enough to trust himself in their hands.

The barber then went on without any interruption to the history of his third brother.

THE HISTORY

OF THE BARBER’S THIRD BROTHER.

Commander of the Faithful (said he to the caliph) my third brother, who was called Bakbac, was quite blind, and his destiny was so wretched, he was reduced to beg, and passed his life in going from door to door, asking charity. He had been accustomed to walk through the streets alone for so long a time, that he had no occasion for any one to lead him. He always used to knock at the different doors, and never to answer till they came and opened them.