"While I was thus busily engaged, I had little time to think of my father, and his last letter to me; and so long as I continued in prosperity, I neglected prayer altogether. Yet I passed before all the world for an honest man, and, judged only by my outward acts, no one would have doubted that I was a God-fearing one."
CHAPTER VIII.
His Marriage—The Portrait—His Terror—His Good Fortune Deserts him—Heavy Losses—The Beggar—Recognises an Old Enemy—His Two Children are Drowned—His Wife Dies—Is Bankrupt—In Prison—The English Clergyman—Is Brought to Repentance—Is Set Free—The Fisherman and Basketmaker.
"God moves in a mysterious way,
His wonders to perform;
He plants His footsteps in the sea,
And rides upon the storm.
"Deep in unfathomable mines
Of never-failing skill
He treasures up His bright designs,
And works His sovereign will
"Judge not the Lord by feeble sense,
But trust Him for His grace;
Behind a frowning Providence
He hides a smiling face."
—COWPER.
"About this time, too, I had got married, being then about thirty-five years of age. This was at Liverpool, and after the ceremony was over I called at the clergyman's house to get a certificate. While he was writing it out for me, I looked round the room, and saw hanging on the wall that very portrait which you see there over the looking-glass. I started back with astonishment, and began trembling violently, so much so, indeed, that I was obliged to support myself by holding on to the table. The clergyman asked me what was the matter. 'Oh, nothing, nothing at all, it is only an attack of giddiness,' said I, with my eyes still riveted on the portrait. I seemed to see my father alive before me, with his eyes fixed upon me in anger; and in my agitation I even fancied I saw the lips of the picture move, and thought I again heard those terrible words, 'My curse shall be upon you, and follow you always!' 'No, no,' I cried aloud, being unable to overcome my terror, 'Oh, do not, do not curse me!' The clergyman, filled with astonishment, asked me the cause of so strange an exclamation. I confessed that it was the portrait of my father, and my meeting with it so unexpectedly, which had produced so strong an impression upon me.
"Upon this he took down the picture and showed me, by the name on the back, that I was mistaken in thinking it was my father's portrait, it being that of an English clergyman who had been dead for some years, so that the resemblance was quite accidental. He spoke also very kindly to me about the words I had used, and gradually led me to tell him the story of my disobedience and my father's anger, and took much pains to convince me that my father's curse could not exercise any unfavourable influence upon me, if I had truly repented of those sins which provoked him to utter it, and if, as a proof of my sincerity, I were now living a different life. All his arguments, however, failed to quiet my conscience, and I returned to my house much troubled in mind.
"Shortly after this I set out for another voyage, but my late good fortune seemed to have deserted me. We met with very rough weather before we had been a month at sea, and in order to save the ship I was obliged to order a great part of the cargo to be thrown overboard, so that when at length we arrived at our destination I found I had lost several hundred pounds on the voyage. The homeward voyage was equally unfortunate, and when, after nearly twelve months' absence, I reached my home and found my dear wife ready to welcome me with our baby in her arms, the joy of such a meeting was marred by the fear that the punishment of my disobedience might fall on the heads of those I loved.
"I have little to tell you about the next six or seven years, during which time my bad fortune still followed me, and the state of my affairs grew gradually worse and worse. One thing, however, I must relate. I had been out one afternoon for a walk, and on returning, just at dusk, I found a poor miserable looking beggar, with a wooden leg, sitting on the grass near our cottage door, eating some food which my wife had just given him. I said a few words to him when I came up, and as some of his answers interested me, I asked him to stop a little while and give me an account of himself.
"I found a poor miserable-looking beggar with a wooden leg."