I mention this not to deface
This cobbler’s reputation,
Whom I have always honest found,
And useful in his station.
But this I urge to let you see
The danger of a fight
Between a cobbler and a priest,
Though he were ne’er so right.
The vicars are a numerous tribe,
So are the cobblers too;
And if a general quarrel rise,
What must the country do?
Our outward and our inward soals
Must quickly want repair;
And all the neighbourhood around
Would the misfortune share.
Sir, quoth the grazier, I believe
Our outward soals indeed
May quickly want the cobbler’s help
To be from leakings freed.
But for our inward souls, I think
They’re of a worth too great
To be committed to the care
Of any holy cheat,
Who only serves his God for gain,
Religion is his trade;
And ’tis by such as these our Church
So scandalous is made.
Why should I trust my soul with one
That preaches, swears, and prays,
And the next moment contradicts
Himself in all he says?
His solemn oaths he looks upon
As only words of course!
Which like their wives our fathers took
For better or for worse.
But he takes oaths as some take w—s,
Only to serve his ease;
And rogues and w—s, it is well known,
May part whene’er they please.