Among the Hindus there are five modes of contracting marriage;[107] the first, or Viváha, after this form: the damsel’s father looks out for a son-in-law, to whom he presents money and goods in proportion to his means, and gives him his daughter, which is the most legitimate mode.[108] The second is the Asurvívahah, when without the consent of the father or mother, by employing force and violence, or the influence of money, the damsel is forcibly taken by the bridegroom from her parents’ house to his own, and there married to him. The third is the Gandharviváhah, when the bridegroom takes the damsel away with her consent, but without the approbation of her parents, and espouses her at his own house. The fourth is the Rákshasa-viváha, when the parties on both sides are at the head of armies, and the damsel, being taken away by force, becomes the victor’s bride.
The fifth is the Písácha-viváha, when the lover, without obtaining the sanction of the girl’s parents, takes her home by means of talismans, incantations, and such like magical practices, and then marries her. Písách, in Sanscrit, is the name of a demon, which takes whatever person it fixes on, and as the above kind of marriage takes place after the same manner, it has been called by this name.
On espousing a damsel, the intelligent Brahman, having taken the bride’s hand into his own, must go through the established forms prescribed by his faith, and move seven steps in advance.[109] When he espouses the daughter of a Chattrí, at the time of solemnizing the marriage, an arrow is to be held at one extremity by the bridegroom, and at the other by the bride; on contracting an alliance with a merchant’s daughter, the bride and bridegroom are to hold a scourge or some similar object in the same manner; on his marriage with the virgin daughter of a cultivator, the parties mark their union by a token of secret intimacy. When they deliver the bride to her husband, if her father be not alive, or her paternal grandfather, or if her brothers be not forthcoming on the occasion, then the most respectable person of the tribe or family is to perform the necessary ceremonies; and if the relations be not intelligent, then the damsel’s mother.
It is to be remarked, that when a girl attains the proper age for entering into the married state, if her parents, notwithstanding their ability, do not provide a husband for her, they commit a great sin. If a distinguished suitor should not present himself, they are however to provide a husband of a good family; this they are to perform only once in their lives, as on the husband’s death it is unlawful for the widow to become the wife of another person: after her husband’s decease, she is obliged to pass the rest of her life in his house. If, previous to advancing the seven steps prescribed at the time of contracting the marriage, there should present himself a more distinguished suitor than the former, it is allowed to take the damsel from the former and give her to the latter, as before advancing the seven paces, the matrimonial contract is not binding. Should a wife prove to be immoral, all intercourse with her must terminate; but putting her to death or turning her out of doors, are also forbidden: she is to be confined to a small and dark chamber, clad in a coarse dress, and to receive food but once a day.
The period of a woman’s illness, according to the Brahmans, extends to sixteen days: on the four days following the first day of the symptoms, all intercourse with her is forbidden. Women are strictly enjoined to show the greatest respect to their husbands, parents, brothers, and relations, and to use every possible exertion for the preservation of their husbands’ property. When he goes on a journey, she is not to deck her person, nor appear cheerful and smiling; she is not to go to entertainments, to the houses of her acquaintances or relations, nor invite them to hers.
As long as a girl is unmarried, it is necessary to guard her with the closest attention; but, when married, this would be highly improper, with this restriction however, that it is by no means fitting that a female, from her tenderest years to the period of her maturity, should be allowed unlimited liberty: on the contrary, she is to be ever submissive and obedient to her father, husband, and relations: but if these should not be in existence, the actual rulers are to take care of her state.
When the husband is on a journey, the wife is not to remain alone in the house, but is to repair to the dwelling of her parents, brethren, or relations; and if, on her husband’s death, she become not a Sattee, that is, burn herself with the deceased, she is then to reside with his relations, devoting herself to rigid abstinence and the worship of the Almighty. They say that when a woman becomes a Sattee, the Almighty pardons all the sins committed by the wife and husband, and that they remain a long time in paradise:[110] nay, if the husband were in the infernal regions, the wife by this means draws him from thence and takes him to paradise; just as the serpent-catcher charms the serpent out of his hole. Moreover the Sattee, in a future birth, returns not to the female sex; but should she reassume the human nature, she appears as a man; but she who becomes not a Sattee, and passes her life in widowhood, is never emancipated from the female state. It is therefore the duty of every woman, excepting one that is pregnant, to enter into the blazing fire along with her deceased husband; a Brahman’s wife in particular is to devote herself in the same fire with her husband; but others are allowed to perform the rite in a separate place. It is however criminal to force the woman into the fire, and equally so to prevent her who voluntarily devotes herself.[111]
The enlightened doctors say, that by a woman’s becoming a Sattee is meant that, on her husband’s decease, she should consume in the fire along with him all her desires, and thus die before the period assigned by nature; as in metaphysical language woman signifies “passion,” or in other words, she is to cast all her passions into the fire; but not throw herself into it along with the deceased, which is far from being praiseworthy. A respectable woman must not from vanity expose herself to the gaze of a stranger, but she is to wear a dress which will completely cover her to the sole of the foot.
It is to be noted, that the son of a Brahman by a Chattri female is not of the father’s caste, but a superior Chattri. It is moreover laid down as a rule that a Brahman, on becoming a Brahmachárí, should regularly worship the fire, which fire he is to discontinue at the time of the marriage contract; but on that occasion he is bound to light another fire and to recite the prescribed prayers, so that it may be as a witness of the compact entered into between husband and wife: also, after the celebration of the marriage, they are to repeat the prayers prescribed at the time of lighting the fire which they are ever after to worship daily.
The Brahman is moreover to offer up Hóma, or burnt offerings, at the rising and setting of the great luminary, and to partake of food twice; once during the day on the expiration of two watches (midday); the second time at night, on the expiration of one watch: he is also to assist with food and clothing, to the utmost of his power, the indigent, and friends who come to his house.