Dear Sir,
I received yours late last evening. Present circumstances, which I will explain to you when I have the honor of seeing you, prevent my giving it a full answer now. The reasons you offer had before been all under consideration. But I must submit to remain some days under the opinion you appear to have formed, not only of my poor understanding in the general interests of America, but of my defects in sincerity, politeness, and attention to your instructions. These offences, I flatter myself, admit of fair excuses, or rather will be found not to have existed. You mention, that you feel yourself hurt. Permit me to offer you a maxim, which has through life been of use to me, and may be so to you, in preventing such imaginary hurts. It is, “always to suppose one’s friends may be right, till one finds them wrong, rather than to suppose them wrong, till one finds them right.” You have heard and imagined all that can be said or supposed on one side of the question, but not on the other.
I am, nevertheless, with sincere esteem, dear Sir, your most obedient and humble servant,
B. FRANKLIN.
TO BENJAMIN FRANKLIN.
Paris, January 30th, 1778.
Dear Sir,
I was yesterday favored with your letter, containing a maxim, which though a very old one, I am bound to thank you for, and can assure you, that so far from disapproving it, it has been one of the constant rules of my life. If you will be pleased to recollect the most extraordinary inattention, to say the least of it, with which I have been treated during the six months I have been in Paris, you will I hope think I have profited by it. You will be pleased likewise to recollect, that after having borne this for a considerable time, I complained to you of it. Forced as I was into this complaint, it was, however, not made without studying how it should be done in a manner least likely to give you offence. I should have been extremely glad, if you had attended to the maxim yourself yesterday. Had you done so, I should not have been supposed to have formed an opinion, that you had a poor understanding in the general interests of America, or that you were insincere. My letter had no such meaning, neither can any such construction be fairly put upon it.
I shall give you another proof of my attention to your maxim, by not being offended at your assertion, “that I have heard and imagined all that can be said or supposed on one side of the question, but not on the other.” You may depend upon it, you have adopted an erroneous opinion, and what that is I will inform you when you favor me with the explanation promised in your letter. You will do me the justice to remember, that it has been my constant endeavor to accommodate the differences, that I found prevailing to a very great degree upon my arrival here. I shall be extremely sorry, and think it a misfortune, if I should be drawn into any with a gentleman of whom I have so high an opinion as I have of you, and for whom I feel so strong a disposition to continue an esteem and friendship. This I hope will not be expected to be done at too great an expense; by my being silent when I think it my duty to speak.