“What colour of hair do you prefer, Mr. Baldwon, black or blonde?”

“I would not care what colour it was, if I only had some!”


“Your last book, madame, had a colossal success.”

“I should say so! Every one of my three divorced husbands wanted to re-marry me!”


A great man was complaining of all the charities to which he was forced to contribute.

“I give without counting,” he groaned.

“Yes, but not without recounting,” replied a friend.