Master Reginald’s tender years having prevented his attendance at the Pantomime, Messrs. Tom, Charlie and Co. kindly give him a résumé of the evening’s performance.
It is always a good thing when we find the subject of a practical joke joining good-naturedly in the mirth, and this we have in a story told by the late Mr. G. A. Sala of a joke played upon him by Lord Dundreary. “I remember going down to the Derby,” writes the famous journalist, “in a highly festive fashion, with poor Edward Sothern, the never-to-be forgotten Lord Dundreary. On this particular day Sothern, the kindest, but still the most provoking of practical jokers, was as full of mischievous pranks as an egg is full of meat. He offered to bet me a guinea before we reached Clapham that I would lose my temper, and lose it badly, before 2 p.m. ‘But why, my dear Sothern,’ I asked, ‘should I lose it? The weather is beautiful, I did my work by getting up at six this morning, I am in the best of all good company, and I haven’t got a penny on the race.’ ‘Never mind,’ persisted Lord Dundreary, ‘I will bet you one guinea that you will blaze up like a vesuvian thrown into the fire before 2 p.m.’
AN EX(BUS)HORSE-TIVE ARGUMENT.
Mazeppa. Now, just you bang that ’bus door smarter to-night, or the old hoss’ll never get a good start.
Carpenter. All right, miss. Cue’s “wild career.” [N.B.—The noble steed is an old “Favourite.”
A PICT-URE.
Show-ing what Mas-ter Tom did af-ter see-ing a pan-to-mime—but you would not do so—oh dear no!—be-cause you are a good boy.
A SWALLOW OUT OF SEASON.
Scene—Boxing-night.
Gentleman in Front (bawling). ’Ar-reee!!!
’Arry, at Back. ’Ullo!!
G. in F. (as before). Where’s Bill-leee!!
’Arry. Why, the young beggar’s been an’ swallered his sixpence in the crowd, and they won’t let ’im in!