“‘Now, Mr. Schmitt, I tell you vat to do undt you vill soon be vell. Ven you go to bed to-night, you make your mindt nice undt quiet like, fill your heart full mit good thoughts of peace undt joy; say a nice little prayer, undt go to sleep. Den, in de morning, ven you get avake, you compose your mindt mit peaceful thoughts, you say a nice little prayer to yourself, and you yusht say: “Mr. Schmitt! Dere iss nodings der matter mit you—you are vell undt shtrong!” Undt you jump out of de bed, undt dere you are!’”
“All right. I did all vat she said. I vent to bed. I said a nice leetle prayer, vat my mudder taught me, in der German language, undt I vent to sleep.
“In der morning I get awake. I haf very peaceful undt peautiful thoughts, undt I say to myself:
“‘Barney Schmitt, you are a tam fool. Dere iss nodings der matter mit you. You are all right.’
“Undt mit dot, I just jump out in der mittle of der floor, undt lit on my pack mit a mighty doonder-knock vat shook der vinders. I fell all in a heap, undt mine Himmel! didn’t I holler! Der bell poy, der hotel clerk, der doctor undt two nurses coom on der double quick, pick me up undt put me in der bed. Undt dere I vas for two weeks, all right. Dat’s vat I know about Gristian Ziance. Undt now here I am in Atlantic City in a rollin’ chair. Pray for me, colonel, for my prayers doesn’t seem to do me much goot!”
ON THE POINT OF A NEEDLE
The late Dr. Talmage was once in the company of some theological students. They were fresh from the study of church history, and were laughing over the old question so much discussed by the schoolmen in the Middle Ages, “How many angels can stand on, or be supported by, the point of a needle?”
They put the question to Dr. Talmage, “How many angels can be supported by the point of a needle?” and Dr. Talmage promptly answered, “Five.” When they wanted to know how he knew, he told them the following story:
“One very stormy night I was coming home late, and noticed a light in the window of a room where I knew a poor woman lived whose husband was lost at sea. I wondered what kept her up so late and I thought I would go and see. I found her hard at work sewing at her lamp, while her five rosy children were sound asleep beside her. And that is how I happen to know that five angels can be supported by the point of a needle.”