“I daresay, but I’ll thank you all the same to let me alone.”
“Not a bit of it; come on.”
And the young fellow dragged the gentleman along in spite of his protests. At last, in order to escape from his inexorable liberator, he was compelled to inform him that he was Rizzi, the superintendent of police himself. Our young hero was let off with a gentle admonition.—Fanfulla.
A gentleman and his valet had been out to a party, where both of them indulged a little too freely. On returning home the valet got into his master’s bed, mistaking it for his own, and the master, not knowing what he did, lay down with his feet on the pillow and his head to the foot of the bed (in the same bed). In the middle of the night one of them began to kick and awoke the other.
“Signor Padrone!” exclaimed the valet, “there’s a scamp of a robber hiding in my bed!”
“You don’t say so!” replied his master; “in that case there must be a pair of them, for I have got one here in my bed. You try and get rid of yours; I’ll make short work with mine.”
And seizing each other by the feet they rolled out of bed and alighted on the floor, where they fell asleep again, and did not discover the true state of affairs till they awoke the next morning.—Gazzetta di Malta.
An old beggar, sitting near a church door, had a board suspended from his neck, inscribed: “Blind from my birth.”
Another beggar, reading the inscription as he passed, was heard to remark—
“Ebbene! There’s a chap who started young in business!”—Il Mondo Umoristico.