Dick: Why, that, wouldn’t be very nice—to take an ax to her.

Tom: I would, only she began to sing “O, Woodman, Spare that Tree.”

Dick: O, behave!

Tom: You know my wife used to be a “summer girl.”

Dick: And what is a “summer girl?”

Tom: A “summer girl” is a rack to stretch shirt-waists on; inside is a compartment for lobster salad, chop suey and ice cream; while outside is an attachment for diamond rings.

Dick: A very good definition, my boy. I suppose you hung a diamond ring on the outside?

Tom: No; I hung up my watch on the inside of a pawnshop.

Dick: Well, don’t worry—a man should be satisfied with what he has.

Tom: O, I’m satisfied with what I have. It’s what I haven’t got that causes most of my dissatisfaction.