"'You do me great honour, respected godfather, by your presence—but please remember, I cannot answer for dwarf slaughter—and murderous crushings. Only look at the quantity of spruce vermin you have done me the favour to bring with you!'
"Stringstriker waved his hand magnanimously, and told his godson that it was of little consequence. Then with a bold leap, the king mounted the long table, picked his way to the middle of it, and there, with legs astride, fast planted himself. Not one of all the guests perceived the larger Dwarf, any more than they could see the countless little ones. Even Annie and the clergyman were stone-blind: so that Klaus, speaking unintelligibly at every turn, had to bear the jokes of all; for young and old, woman and man, chimed readily in with the tone of sportive raillery, as soon as it was once pitched.
"The company indeed persisted in laughing and rioting so loudly at the bridegroom's expense, that the pastor of the flock at length felt himself called upon to assume his face of office—to put a damper, as it were, upon the unseemly proceeding. Just as he began, a new dish, soup with crabs' noses, (hotchpotch,) engaged exclusively the regard of the whole of the guests. A full plate was set before every visitor, but scarcely set before him, before, with the speed of lightning, from chair-backs, window-sills, stove-cornices, nay, from the floor itself, innumerable dwarfs bounded on to the table, and, taking their places by all the plates, in three seconds consumed the savoury viand. To complete the astonishment, the confusion, the wrath, the fury of the voracious boors, Stringstriker himself galloped up and down the whole length of the table, breaking all the vessels, and draining all the beer and brandy with wonderful celerity.
"Had the most precious jewels of the Holy Roman Empire been plundered by the Turks, there could not have been a greater commotion than arose among the wedding-guests. Every man jumped up, turned in anger and disgust towards his neighbour, sate down again, and again began to reach after the food, without being able, of course, to get a morsel. Then every man swore his neighbour was making a fool of him, and, from the coarsest words, it came, without loss of time, to dreadful menaces and blows. So greedy were some after the liquorish cookery that they gave themselves good smart punctures in lip and tongue; inasmuch as the mischievous dwarfs, as soon as any in his haste forked up a piece of meat, incontinently had it down their own throats. With such provocation, the blows, on all sides, came down in showers; more ears were peppered, backs thumped, ribs punched, than the prize-ring of England had ever seen. And, as if it were not enough for the men to be sparring, the women, seeing their husbands covered with blood and bruises, must needs take up the cudgels, and fall to fighting too! A hundred arms were a-kimbo in a twinkling. Caps were dragged off, and nails shown with amazonian spirit. There was a general mêlée; every soul at the table was engaged in the contest. Marriage and bridal pair were forgotten; and Klaus roared at the droll uproar till his throat smarted again: for, not much to his regret, he soon enough became aware that his enemies and his calumniators were the parties who were coming off second best.
"This mutual threshing had lasted a good quarter of an hour, when a sign from Stringstriker directed the bride-groom to scatter the yew-leaves. In an instant the table was covered with them; and the guests, as if bewitched, dispersed in grotesque groups, and remained transfixed. Every eye was on the busy dwarfs. Klaus's godfather, crossing his legs, seated himself upon the table, and began to scrape his fiddle. The earth mannikins then arranged themselves in order, swung their broad hats gracefully, and, one stepping upon the shoulder of another, built up a living pyramid above the bride. A number clambered up to the very top of her tinsel crown, where, still two and two, they took possession of a spangle, fixed themselves upon it, and rocking to and fro, set up a soft and tender song. The bride danced to its tune, the pyramid of dwarfs along with her; and it was enchanting to see how their shining silvery girdles, and the bright clasps upon their caps, flashed and sparkled in the varying figure. Three times the dwarfs changed in the building of this pyramid, and three times, attended by it, must the bride dance round the table, through the gaping groups of guests. This done, Stringstriker played a lively march, broke through a window with his fiddlestick, and leapt out through the opening—whilst the whole dwarf brotherhood, waltzing, laughing, tumbling, in a countless crowd, prepared to follow him. For a time the procession fluctuated through the air, where the girdles yet sparkled. Soon, like a dissolving gleam, all vanished!
"The stupified boors were now able to stir themselves again. Doubtless there were many bumps, black and blue faces, and bloody noses: but the sight of all could not suppress the most extravagant merriment. All that had happened was looked upon as a prank of the fiddler, and many in their hearts felt that they had only received a just punishment for their coarse and unchristian calumnies.
"Klaus Stringstriker's fame lived upon every tongue. The dwarfs obtained no mean eulogies: and when it was at last discovered that the small mannikins had, close before the window, one and all thrown down their broad brown capkins with the brilliant clasps, the company for joy was almost mad. The bridegroom was importuned, in remembrance of this marvellous festival, to bestow upon each guest one such dwarf-hatkin, and Klaus did not need a long begging. Each one acquired a hatkin with its agraffe: some of a greedy nature, by stealth, possessed themselves of two. The presents given, the company returned to the board, and drank and uproared far into the night.
"Upon the morrow, Klaus found the Dwarf-hatkins turned into so many Kremnitz double ducats, and upon each there lay, glittering in the sunshine, a fine diamond. As he gathered them, a delicate voice from unseen lips whispered to him that these were his father's hairs. All the gift-receivers had the same wonder to tell. Those, however, who had secretly taken away the second dwarf's cap were punished for the theft— for they got nothing from the transformation but a wet and worthless beech-leaf.
"From that hour all haunting upon Klaus's estate ceased. Even at the Dwarf's well nothing remarkable was seen, save once a-year—upon the anniversary of the young boor's wedding-day—when a great gamboling flame appeared upon the waters, in which a singing and ringing might be heard, like the voices of the smallest beings. The fortunate Klaus built himself a great house, repurchased the tavern, and upon the pillar where Stringstriker, tied up by his father, had had to fiddle so long, he carved an inscription which published the Dwarf's praise to every guest And his father's grave he surrounded with a fair iron grating. As for himself, his intercourse with the Dwarf had made him prudent. He ruled his substance discreetly, helped the poor, and cautioned the light-witted by the relation of his own history. So he became the richest and most respected man of the whole neighbourhood; and at length acquired the name of the Dwarf's advocate: because, as Klaus maintained, and as it was generally believed, a most important service had been rendered, by the passages of Klaus's history, to these singular and benevolent earth-spirits themselves."