And then she’s off to hubby dear
To touch him for ten dollars.
| When You Marry Her | When You Marry Him |
|---|---|
| When you marry her, love her; | After you marry him, study him; |
| After you marry her, study her; | If he is secretive, trust him; |
| When she is blue, cheer her; | If he is sad, cheer him; |
| When she is talkative, by all means listen to her; | When he is talkative, listen to him; |
| If she dresses well, compliment her; | When he is quarrelsome, ignore him; |
| When she is cross, humor her; | If he is jealous, cure him; |
| If she does you a favor, kiss her; | If he cares naught for pleasure, coax him; |
| When she is jealous, cure her; | |
| If dinner is cold, eat it, not her; | If he favors society, accompany him; |
| When she looks pretty, tell her so; | When he deserves it, kiss him; |
| Let her feel how well you understand her— | Let him think how well you understand him— |
| But never let her know she isn’t boss. | But never let him know that you manage him. |
Pasture Pot Pourri
I didn’t like her apartment so I knocked her flat.
A parson in London, England, has been unfrocked for kissing a servant girl. This smacks of intolerance.