* * *
What has become of the old fashioned man who used to be able to hit a bullseye on the spittoon at thirty feet range?
* * *
Authorities have ruled that liquor can be placed in mince pies legally. But if we had the liquor, we wouldn’t wait for the pie.
* * *
A Minnesota man has a dog that chews tobacco and still has some sense left. But it doesn’t drink the liquor peddled these days.
* * *
A writer to the Whiz Bang asks, “Is marriage a success.” We’ll solve the question by letting the married folk fight it out among themselves.
* * *
A politician says the American people are being coddled too much. He’s right. Even the bootleggers won’t let you pour out your own drink any more.