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The old fashioned girl used to stay home when she had nothing to wear.
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The feminine half of the world may not know how the masculine half lives, but it never tires of trying to find out.
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The Luck of the Irish
An Irishman at confession noticed that the priest had a watch on a fob. As it was easy he nicked it. Continuing his confession he said, “And Father, I stole a gold watch and fob from a man, but I will give it to you.” The priest was horrified by the suggestion and said, “No, you must give it to the man you took it from.” Pat replied, “But, Father, I offered it to him and he would not take it.” Then, said the priest, “You may keep it.”
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