Wife’s on t’us!

Such a pretty mess!

* * *

In the Day’s News

“The other day my mother sent me to the grocery store for a pound of sugar. The grocer did not have any on hand, so I went out. When I got on the icy sidewalk I slipped and fell, but I went home with some lumps anyway.”

* * *

“Waiter, bring me a cup of coffee the color of my girl’s neck.”

* * *

His Pathos Burning

“You know, folks, what makes me so late in arriving at this party is that my mother lost a lid off the kitchen range, and I had to sit on the stove to keep the smoke in until she found the lid.”